Delegates: Waste No Time, Make a Switch

[I’m Gonna Wash That Man Right Outta My Hair, Rodgers and Hammerstein]

How true are the words to this song when applied to our current “situation”!!! And how prescient are my old time heroes, Rodgers and Hammerstein in their 1949 broadway musical, South Pacific. Here’s a South Park-inspired version. This post was inspired by myiq2xu’s: http://myiq2xu.wordpress.com/2008/08/19/how-to-turn-win-into-whine/

The most difficult part about writing this was deciding which line to use as the title, because there are a plethora of appropriate choices. I began with the oh-so-eraser-friendly Denver ballot analogy: “rub him out of the roll call.” However, I carefully reconsidered in case it might be misconstrued in Soprano-like terms.

Read the lyrics and see for yourself. What a choice for l’il ole Libra me to have to make! I did it, but pick a line, any line in the song, and you’ve got a winner — I mean a winner about a loser. As for the two pinup men at the end: not up on these things and haven’t a clue — unless they’re the current or ex-boyfriends of the video producer. If they’re famous or sports stars, oops, sorry.

Personally, I’ve got the man I want to wash out of my hair clearly focused in my mind. Oh, no, guess not, he’s gone. Washed up and washed out! From my lips. . . .

I’m Gonna Wash That Man Right Outta My Hair
from South Pacific by Rodgers and Hammerstein

I’m gonna wash that man right outta my hair,
I’m gonna wash that man right outta my hair,
I’m gonna wash that man right outta my hair,
And send him on his way.

I’m gonna wave that man right outta my arms,
I’m gonna wave that man right outta my arms,
I’m gonna wave that man right outta my arms,
And send him on his way.

Don’t try to patch it up
Tear it up, tear it up!
Wash him out, dry him out,
Push him out, fly him out,
Cancel him and let him go!
Yea, sister!

I’m gonna wash that man right outta my hair,
I’m gonna wash that man right outta my hair,
I’m gonna wash that man right outta my hair,
And send him on his way.

If a man don’t understand you,
If you fly on separate beams,
Waste no time, make a change,
Ride that man right off your range.
Rub him out of the roll call
And drum him out of your dreams.
Oho!

If you laugh at different comics,
If you root for different teams,
Waste no time, weep no more,
Show him what the door is for.
Rub him out of the roll call
And drum him out of your dreams.

You can’t light a fire when the woods are wet,
No!
You can’t make a butterfly strong,
Hmm, hmm!
You can’t fix an egg when it ain’t quite good,
And you can’t fix a man when he’s wrong!
You can’t put back a petal when it falls from a flower,
Or sweeten up a fellow when he starts turnin’ sour
Oh no! Oh no!

If his eyes get dull and fishy,
When you look for glints and gleams,
Waste no time,
Make a switch,
Drop him in the nearest ditch!
Rub him out of the roll call,
And drum him out of your dreams
Oho! Oho!

I went and washed that man right outta my hair,
I went and washed that man right outta my hair,
I went and washed that man right outta my hair,
And sent him on his way.

She went and washed that man right outta her hair,
She went and washed that man right outta her hair,
She went and washed that man right outta her hair,
And sent him on his way!

And if you haven’t had enough, here’s a karaoke, slightly off-key version from Pequinito. Appropriate, ain’t it? Sing along, enjoy yourself. I hate to be redundant, but this wash bears repeating. In fact, my hair is so dirty from all this DNC, Nobama, Pelosi, Dean grime, that I’ll have to shampoo it twice in order to get it clean.

(cross-posted from Lady Boomer NYC)