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Conflucian Cocktail Party: We need a little Christmas

Oh, man!  I am all lost now.  WordPress has changed its post page.  All the icons have moved to different places.  Bear with me while I figure this sucker out.

It’s that time of year again.  Time to break out the decorations.  You don’t even have to be Christian to play along, as my mother, the Jehovah’s Witness never tired of reminding me.  Much of the Christmas holiday is grounded in Saturnalia that the Christians copped from the Romans.  That whole holly and ivy thing?  Probably copied from the Celts who had a thing for dragging greenery into the house, as did the Germans with their trees.

This year, I’m a little more excited about Christmas than I have been in the past.  The days got short on me almost without warning.  I don’t know where the summer went while I was blogging and coming home from work in the dark is just dreary.  But right around Christmas time, the days will start to lengthen again and before you know it, the birds will be waking you up at 5:00AM.  It’s something to look forward to, not to mention the smell of Christmas tree, the sparkle of tinsel and the taste of cinnamon and cloves.

So, settle back and join in this first of many Conflucian Holiday Parties.  I hope to see a Hannukah party and a little something on Kwanzaa too.  Rico our bartender with flair is taking the night off.  He’s beat.  I know just how he feels.  But never fear.  We still have cocktails.  Our guest bartender tonight is Alberta Straub, or “Flighty”.  Her special drink for the night is a Date With David Bowie.  Check it out:

I’m sipping a Bulleit Bourbon with middle notes that remind me of Juicy Fruit gum.  Delish!  But you can order anything you like.

Our entertainment tonight is from an American classic, a Charlie Brown Christmas.  Vince Guaraldi’s cool, west coast jazz was a perfect accompaniment to the round headed kid who was the very opposite of cool.  Feel the anticipation with Christmas is Coming:

Or Saturnalia.  Feel your inner pagan.

Ladies and Gents, regulars and newcomers, we run a respectable joint around here.  If you can’t say something nice, leave it with Florence, our lovely checkroom attendant.  The waiters will be circulating with some of the marshmallows we made earlier in the day, some cheddar cheese sticks and piggy back dates.  Please drink responsibly, tip your wait staff generously and join me at 10PM EST for Conflucians Say on PUMA United Radio (PURrrr).

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Barack Obama for Kids

Bruce Handy , a self-professed Obama fan, reviewed three children’s biographies of Barack Obama for tomorrow’s New York Times Book Review.

As an Upper West Sider and member of the media elite, one who’s scared of John McCain’s rickety temperament and doesn’t find Sarah Palin credible on any subject or even as hot as Republican bumper stickers and obliging foreign leaders would have us believe…I’m all for Obama.

But thankfully, his gag reflex has survived, despite his heavy intake of Koolaid. He actually dares to ask the question, what if Obama is not only “the first black president” but also a “the first lousy black president?” Look out Bruce. You’re going to be on the receiving end of a lot of angry O-bot e-mail now. Continue reading

Blame the Superdelegates for the impending disaster

If I hear one more person try to guilt me into voting for this lightweight in order to save the nation, I’m going to dope slap him/her.

There are people who are responsible for the impending disaster.  They are the Superdelegates.  They have a choice.  They can go with the competent, dedicated, brilliant, knowledgeable DEMOCRAT, or they can choose the post partisan, unscrupulous, unethical, schmoozer whose party loyalty is in doubt.

To US, the choice is simple.  It’s not our fault that we refuse to swallow the poison.

When Obama loses in November, and he will, look to the people who had the obligation to rescue the country from three consecutive terms of Republican rule.  The Superdelegates.

I Am Ridiculous

It’s true! At least, according to the media, the Democratic Party, and of course, the man even our bought-and-paid-for press corpse is starting to call the “presumptuous nominee.”

I’m not ridiculous because I’m a PUMA, though. I’m ridiculous first, because I’m a woman, and second, because I’m a woman who refuses to do what Daddy tells me to.

You know, there’s just something so icky about being a woman anyway. And kind of embarrassing. I mean, I look down at my body, and I have two bumps where I don’t need them, and I’m missing a critical bump somewhere south of my belly button. Ewwwwwww, what’s that about? If only I had that bump, I could be in charge. I could do whatever I wanted to and no one would think it was ridiculous.

Look at George W. Bush. This man has the manners of a pig in slop. He talks with his mouth full, he farts, he calls his right-hand man “Turd Blossom,” he gives the Chancellor of Germany a shoulder rub, he can’t keep from invading peoples’ personal space. Of course, his Bushisms are legendary.

Yet is he ridiculous? Why no. For most of his horrific Reign of Error, no one in the press or the Democratic Party questioned this man’s credibility or right to be in his seat. He has that scrap of flesh hanging off his pelvis, so he must be respected.

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LV vs. RV: The Democrats’ Losing Proposition

 A couple of very interesting polls have come out recently. One shows Barack Obama leading John McCain nationally, and another shows John McCain leading Barack Obama nationally. The difference between these polls? Likely Voters versus Registered Voters.

Obama was ahead 47%-44% among registered voters, down from a 6-percentage point lead he had last month. McCain led 49%-45% among likely voters, reversing a 5-point Obama lead among that group. In both cases, the margin of error is +/—4 points.

What’s going on? Here is how USA Today explains the methodology behind their polling.

To determine whether they were likely voters, poll participants were asked how much thought they had given the election, how often they voted in the past and whether they plan to vote this fall. McCain’s gains came because there was an even number of likely voters from each party. Last month, the Democrats had an 11-point edge. (emphasis added)

Now, there are two ways to look at that astonishing fact. One is that Republicans are starting to energize against Barack Obama. This is, of course, the way that USA Today interprets it.

The other is that Democrats are losing interest in Barack Obama and are planning on either voting down-ticket, staying home, or using the nuclear option (literally?) by voting for John McCain. This is the way I interpret it. I mean, gee whiz, doesn’t that huge drop in support for Obama (11 points in one month) coincide quite interestingly with the formation of a certain group comprised of Democrats who don’t support Obama? Golly, if only I could remember the name of that combine of crazy old ladies…

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KKKarl Rove and Donna Brazile: Perfect Together

[Original photos here and here.]

A commenter at The Confluence found this extraordinary chronology of the relationship between KKKarl and Donna.

If you don’t have an “ah-HA!” moment after you read this, STEP AWAY FROM THE KOOL-AID. It’s obviously causing brain damage.

No wonder Obama is starting to sound like a right-wing Republican. No wonder he is getting such favorable media instead of McCain, the original and traditional Media Darling. No wonder he had so much money at the beginning of his campaign – over $100 million from Bush Pioneers, oil companies, and Republican bundlers. No wonder he won red-state caucuses so handily but often lost the primaries from those same states. (A prime example: The Texas Pri-Caucus. Hillary won the primaries but Obama won the caucuses; thus he claimed victory in the delegate count.) Obama earned more delegates from his Idaho caucus victory than Clinton did from her victories in Ohio, Texas and Rhode Island COMBINED.

Continue reading

What About Bush? A Play in One Final Act.

[BUMPED, by katiebird]

THE SCENE: The Oval Office. PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH is absent from the seat behind the desk. VICE PRESIDENT DICK CHENEY squats there instead, toad-like, hands folded on his stomach, chin down, snoring gently. A large box on the desk reads: “DC TRANSLATOR – PUSH RED BUTTON TO ACTIVATE.” There is a comfy-looking sofa on one side of the desk, and a couple of wing chairs rest on the other side.

The clock on the wall reads 8:59. It’s morning, and the windows are full of light.

The clock hits 9:00. BUSH enters through a side door, wiping a little extra powder from under his nose.

BUSH [walking over to CHENEY, amped]: Woo-hoo! [shakes CHENEY awake] That was some good shit, Dick. Paraguay again?

CHENEY: [grouchy] Grrrmmm-mmrrrm-prrrrmmmm! [CHENEY only speaks in sneers and mumbles.]

BUSH: God bless it, I forgot again. [presses red button on DC translator] Say what, Dick?

CHENEY: I said, no, that’s prime shit from Colombia. They’re upping their production lately.

BUSH: [crossing to sofa next to desk and lying on it, hands crossed behind his head] Well, shit, freedom isn’t free.

CHENEY: [rolling eyes] Sure, George, whatever you say. [brief, awkward pause]

BUSH: [fidgeting nervously] Heh-heh. Say, where’s Bolty with my daily briefing? You know how I hate it when people are late.

[JOSH BOLTEN, Bush’s Chief of Staff, enters through another door.]

BOLTEN [nervous]: H-h-hello, Mr. President. Mr. Vice President. I apologize for my inexcusable lateness, but there was a gas leak on my street, some houses exploded, and well, my wife and kids are dead. I had to make a few arrangements. [The clock on the wall still reads 9 am.]

BUSH: Gosh, that’s terrible, Bolty. I hope you know that your wife and kids died as heroes. We’re fighting them over there so we don’t have to fight them here! [Bush smiles expectantly. Awkward pause again.]

BOLTEN: Uh, thanks, Mr. President. That was, um, very inspirational.

BUSH: Of course it was! Now, just give me my briefing, and you can have the rest of the day off for the memorial service and golfing.

BOLTEN: G-g-golfing, sir?

BUSH: Sure! That’s what my parents did when my little sister died. Isn’t that what everyone does? Help me out here, Dick?

CHENEY [rolling his eyes]: Mrrrmmmm-hmphmmm-grmmmm!

BOLTEN: Darned thing! Here, let me, Mr. President. [crosses to desk, hits Cheney translator a couple of times, presses the red button again]

BUSH: Heh-heh. Never mind, we’ll catch you on the other side, Dick-o. So anyway, Bolty, how’s Operation Loose End going?

BOLTEN: [cheering up a bit] Excellente, sir! [His Spanish accent is impeccable.]

BUSH [threatened]: Say what now?

BOLTEN [contritely]: Oh, I apologize for my poor pronunciation, sir. I mean [butchering the word] excellente! [sits in one of the wing chairs next to the desk]

BUSH [relieved]: Oh. Okay then! So, we finally got that asshole Maliki to open the gates? [CHENEY smirks widely.]

BOLTEN: Yessir, that mission is accomplished. Iraq’s oil leases are ready for the taking.

CHENEY: Heckuva job, Georgie! Thank Halliburton that no one was able to get access to my secret energy meeting minutes before we invaded Iraq.

BUSH: Heh-heh. Yeah, Dick-o, wouldn’t have been too good if the American people knew how you guys were already divvying up the pot back in Oh-One, now, would it? [All three snicker knowingly.]

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