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KISS stands for Keep It Simple Stupid. It’s a corollary of Occam’s Razor, which can be summarized as “The simplest solution is most likely the right one.”

You could apply the above to the first day of the Impeachment hearings as well. Let’s take a look at they arguments:

1.) Bill Taylor and George Kent: These two career diplomats were alarmed to find that Donald Trump had created a shadow state department in Ukraine. This shadow state was tasked with putting pressure on the new government of Ukraine to get damaging information on Hunter Biden in exchange for Congressionally allocated funds to Ukraine for arms and other non-combat aid.

The result of this bribe was to put Ukraine in a weakened position with respect to peace negotiations with Russia, which had invaded and taken possession of approximately 7% of Ukraine’s territory. That doesn’t sound like a lot of land but as real estate experts say, “location, location, location”. Crimean ports on the Black Sea are crucial to a largely land locked Russia.

Annnnnnd that’s it! Trump withheld money that was already allocated to Ukraine in exchange for dirt on his political opponents, resulting in damaging the security of the region and, by extension, Western Europe.

2.) The Nunes narrative. Ok, I listened to it and I still have no idea what the f#%* he’s talking about. Judging by the expressions on the witnesses’ faces, neither did they. The story is complex and improbable. Take for example the proposition that all these insane machinations on Ukraine’s part were to help Hillary Clinton and hurt Donald Trump. Well, that didn’t work out so well even if any of this actually happened the way Republicans say it did.

When I was a kid, there was a joke that went like this:

Q. If you’re flying in a canoe and the wheels drop off, how many pancakes does it take to cover a house?

A. None, because there are no bones in ice cream.

That’s how Devin Nunes sounds. It’s worse than a Chewbacca Defense because that we acknowledge does not make sense. But the Nunes defense not only doesn’t make sense it’s supposed to confuse you. If you’re confused and can’t follow what your Republican congressman is saying, you’re less likely to watch the hearing. And if you’re less likely to watch, you’ll miss how simple this all is.

The president bribed a foreign government asking for damaging information on his political rival in exchange for desperately needed arms that the Congress allocated for it. Trump put our national security at risk by not thinking this through.

And here’s the cherry on top: The whistleblower was very effective because as soon as the jig was up, the money to Ukraine was released – and not a second sooner. So, Trump et al were perfectly fine to have Ukraine twisting in the wind, until they were caught.

At some point, Nunes and friends are going to have to tell us why Trump couldn’t use the American intelligence agencies to look into corruption in Ukraine if he was so adamant about getting rid of it.

So, there it is Niles. The simplest explanation is that Trump committed an impeachable offense. There’s no real counter argument that makes sense, and there are additional witnesses coming up who will make Trump look very, very bad. These are people with first hand knowledge.

But if you don’t want to watch it’s because you really don’t want to know.

9 Responses

  1. It’s like your joke, but at least that is whimsical. What Republicans and their web of “Q” and Breitbart and various psychologically disturbed people do, is to try to take whatever facts are obvious,and then twist them into a narrative that vilifies their enemies and makes them look noble. It is not dissimilar from the way that for centuries in Europe, “The Jews” were always claimed to be responsible for the natural calamities, the Plague, civil unrest, poverty and famine.

    Here, the dots that they needed to connect in some weird configuration were the hacking of the DNC and the Podesta mails; the need to have Russia not guilty of it, despite every Intelligence Agency saying they were; the imperative of being able to say that Russia did not help Trump win; the necessity of making Hillary the villain, now and always. So they, with the very likely help of Russia, made up this insane story about how Russia didn’t hack, it was its enemy Ukraine; and that it was not to hurt the Democrats and Hillary, it was designed to help them! But it didn’t work, because somehow Hillary lost anyway to the savior Trump; and then Hillary and the Intelligence Agencies had a backup plan of planting a false dossier which implicated Russia, in the hope that this would get rid of Trump; but Trump and his gallant band foiled that; so now they are claiming that Trump pressured Ukraine, but the real story is that Biden was corrupt, not Trump, and that Trump never pressured Ukraine, he was trying to root out corruption in that country, and also stop the Democrats from trying to sneak back into power. If they admitted in private that this was absolute nonsense and lies, it would at least be something; but I think that they believe it, just like the people in Germany believed Hitler’s lies and demonizations, because they had the psychological need to do so.

    In this both-sides world, with no objective reality, one story is apparently as good as any other. Mafia burns down a store, kills all the owners; says, ‘we didn’t do it, the owners did, because they wanted to make us look bad. That’s our story, deal with it.” They absolutely count on the media either throwing up their hands in weariness and letting them purvey their fantasy, or eagerly jumping on it as another opportunity to have exciting arguments on TV. Thus they need the Republicans, just like the medieval Christians needed the concept of the devil. “Search for truth” is so outmoded a concept. “Here’s what the Democrats say, here’s what the Republicans say, let’s have at it.” Thus crackpots and the more insidious forces of evil will always have a forum, because it is a necessary part of the game. In a not unrelated story, Ohio Republicans have just passed a bill which says that if a student answers a science related question with a creationist theory, they must not be graded down for it, the teacher must accept the answer. “What is causing global warming?” “There is no global warming.” “God has a plan, and we must abide by it.” “Hillary Clinton is causing it.” A’s for all!

  2. AG Barr tells the populace today that the impeachment hearings are what is holding up work on gun control legislation. Not Mitch McConnell, who received such a bill passed by Pelosi and the House 260 days ago, and has refused to bring it to the floor. Not Cindy Hyde-Smith, who like the good NRA lapdog she is, lodged an objection to Chris Murphy’s efforts today to bring the background check bill to a potential vote, thus stymieing it. Our democracy at work–oh, yes, the Republicans always tell us that it is not a democracy, it is a republic! Ah! Meanwhile, the media has another good argument to air: “Republicans claim that Democrats holding impeachment hearings is stopping background check legislation, while Democrats say that is not the case.” Let’s discuss!”

    • Lord only an idiot is going to believe that Moscow Mitch is holding up gun legislation because of impeachment. Gun legislation was passed months and months ago and sat on Moscow’s desk.

  3. RD:

    Q. If you’re flying in a canoe and the wheels drop off, how many pancakes does it take to cover a house?

    A. None, because there are no bones in ice cream.



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