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      So, you’re probably aware of the furor over Cambridge Analytica. They scraped Facebook’s database, and used the psychological information to craft their campaign. They have also been caught on tape admitting they do dirty tricks like honey traps, and propaganda (knowing lies). And there is much wailing and gnashing of teeth. First of all, it […]
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Pigs, Fleas and Trump

Let’s revisit narcissism, shall we?  

I’m no professional but I’ve had a lot of personal experience dealing with people who are on the narcissism spectrum. I’m beginning to know a narcissist when I see one or when I detect one delivering their special brand of attention by proxy. 

Not everyone who exhibits narcissistic tendencies has full blown narcissistic personality disorder or NPD. It’s a spectrum disorder. In fact, it’s not a bad thing for us to have some degree of self love or mean people will take advantage of our selflessness. And it’s not uncommon for people who are living with narcissists and who are having their own issues to display some narcissistic tendencies. They usually subside when the crisis resolves itself. You can tell a narcissist from a codependent by how much guilt and contrition they feel when they hurt someone else. Narcissists with NPD don’t give a fuck. They can fake it for awhile but it never lasts. 

Donald Trump has NPD. There’s really no question about that. Is there anyone here who doesn’t understand what I’m talking about?  Don’t be shy, raise your hands. He’s the overt type. Bernie Sanders looks like he may be skirting close to the edge of NPD as well but let’s put him aside for now. 

Given what we know about Trump and his severe character problems, what can we understand about the people who follow him?  I’ve wondered this for awhile. I think we have got it wrong about them being too stupid for their own good. No, if you’ve ever had an interaction with a Bush supporter or a Trumpster and they’ve reveled in your distress and told you to deal with it because their side won, then you know that there’s something else at work here. 

This video from Ross Rosenberg unpacks it for you: 

So, what he’s saying is the reason why Trumpsters will follow him no matter what is because they identify with him. They don’t have the visceral negative reaction to his behavior the way you do. They see nothing wrong with him disrespecting women, poor people, the disabled, the sick, Muslims, etc. WE feel pain, they do not. 

Trump is a pig and he attracts piggish people. They don’t feel empathy the way we do. They want to win. They like control. And for the conformist, conventional person who has always colored inside the lines, Trump and Pence validate their lifestyles, make them feel virtuous and special, and give them the control over others they always wanted. Trump and Pence make their narrow minded, judgemental meanness acceptable. 

If you’re living with one of these people, you’re going to get dirty. It’s not in your nature but it can make you feel out of place if you’re surrounded by them. To stay in their good graces, you may have to jettison some of your own values or become apathetic. Of course, everyone has choices…

It’s pointless to defend ourselves. They like controlling the vertical and horizontal and pissing us off and causing us distress. It’s what they live for. They’re absolutely delighted with our anger. We can’t win this argument because they DID win. The only thing we can do is disengage. We can observe them but not get down in the mud with them. As long as they’re in control, they’ll follow Trump to the ends of the earth. There’s nothing he can do that will turn them away. 

The allies had to fire bomb Dresden and invade and subdue Berlin before Germans gave up in WWII. They need to be completely conquered before they give up and they’re going to be nasty, difficult and personal before they surrender and go away. Expect this and don’t let it get to you.  

We need to accept their character disorder and stop trying to figure out how to appeal and placate them. Sure, there were people who Trump deceived. Those people are drifting back over to our side. It is the hard core narcissists who remain firmly in his corner. They’re in every branch of government and they’re quickly solidifying their hold on power. We are going to have to work extra hard next year to get at least one chamber of the legislative branch back. It’s going to be a difficult and very expensive struggle. But we don’t have a choice. 

If you’ve been watching the Handmaid’s Tale, you’ll get an idea of what we’re up against in the latest episode called The Bridge where Offred attempts to talk another Handmaid off a bridge because she sees nothing but despair for the foreseeable future, surrounded by Pence-esque covert narcissists in religious clothing. Offred tells her it won’t last. Someday, Gilead will be over and they’ll go dancing and drinking and singing karaoke. 

And that’s all true. This phase of our history won’t last, especially if we are determined to overthrow the people who took over our government by aggressive and uncompromising measures. We didn’t put up enough of a fight. We were too nice and believed it couldn’t happen to us, underestimating the people with character disorders who were determined to stop at nothing to take control. 

But we can get our country back if we don’t let them rattle us and concentrate on the task at hand. 

We can set it right again. The bad thing is that once we do, we’ll know who those people are. They’ll still walk among us and we’ll never be able to let our guard down again because they don’t give a fuck about anyone but themselves. 

Deploy your shields. 


52 Responses

  1. Shield up!

  2. Raise shields AND fire phasers!

  3. Just finished 45 minutes on the tread mill. Gotta maintain my three diamonds now that I rediscovered them.
    Feeling pretty good.

    • Aha, I do treadmill and brisk walks on Crescent trail. But my Schwinn AD6 Airdyne bike is here. It is supposed to be a higher calorie burner for the same amount of time you spend on a treadmill.

      • I used to take spin. I mean I suffered thru it. I hated going to third and climbing hills. There are enough hills in Pittsburgh as it is.

        That being said, I wiggled comfortably into a 6 last week. It might be time to slow things down so I don’t look sick.

  4. Never go to Aldi’s on an empty stomach.

    I can’t get high… period.

  5. need a shower. ahhh….

    • Funny, I never read the lyrics before. THAT’S interesting.

      It’s just a shower song to me.

      • It’s just a shower song to me.

        Well, I guess I can see how it might get you lathered up 😉

  6. Some people mistake loutishness for strength, RD – they’re not *all* closet narcissists.

    • Strength to do what?
      Think about that for awhile.

      • Yeah. Strength to push others down and diminish their existence and self worth so that they can feel superior. Every outrage video in Walmart and this and that other place we have seen has a suburbanite berating the ‘unwanted’ people.

        Great post. I am used to saying the same thing that he was a feature for them and not a bug. Every rally goer wished he was Trump.

        • Yeah, color me puzzled. How is a lout better than a guy with NPD?
          And his followers don’t have to be full blown. They could be somewhere on the spectrum. My suspicion is a lot of them are covert and are respected members of their communities (well, not MY community. I’ve got standards, but you get my drift.)

          Your point about the strength to push others down was spot on.

          • Too many of my fellow non-elite whites prefer the neurochemical rush of (apparently) successful dominance behavior over the tangible rewards of social democracy.

            This, of course, is because they are stupid. 😛

          • I don’t think they’re stupid. They just don’t want anyone or anything to get in their way.

          • I guess you and I use different definitions of “stupid”.

            To me, choosing the nasty rush of social dominance over real, material gains indicates stupidity, or at least a lack of self-control.

          • I just reminded myself of something I had shuffled to the back of my mind.

            Perhaps instead of “stupidity”, I should say that they lack self-control.

            I have read that often, the only real difference between a criminal, or more broadly, an aggressive personality, and a non-criminal or non-aggressor is that the criminal/aggressor, for whatever reason(s), has weaker self-control.

            If they were smarter and/or more highly self-controlled, perhaps they would realize that their best chance of improving their lots in life lay with co-operative behavior, to achieve social democracy, instead of competitive/aggressive behavior–which at its worst, can lead to imprisonment and/or lasting injury and/or premature death, making it a poor choice.

          • Not my point, RD. Let me try to be a bit more clear. Your claim is that Trump’s supporters are also narcissists:

            Trump is a pig and he attracts piggish people. They don’t feel empathy the way we do. They want to win. They like control. And for the conformist, conventional person who has always colored inside the lines, Trump and Pence validate their lifestyles, make them feel virtuous and special, and give them the control over others they always wanted. Trump and Pence make their narrow minded, judgemental meanness acceptable.

            That’s probably true in some cases, but I don’t think it’s universally correct. They may have “colored inside the lines”, they may be “conventional”, but I’m not sure they’re necessarily “somewhere on the spectrum” of NPD. In fact, I suspect that some of them may have very little self-regard at all.

            I do think, however, that nearly everyone who runs for political office (left, right, or center) is.

          • You didn’t read all of what I wrote. I said that there were some who were deceived. Not everyone who voted for Trump is a narcissist.
            But as Lady V pointed out, there are probably a fair number of Trump voters who are somewhere on the spectrum and may be covert narcissists. They’re the most destructive because they tend to come off like the “good as gold”, caring citizens of humanity.
            If that’s true of their character, why the fuck did they vote for him? He’s not a good man, or a smart one, or strong. He’s full of himself. It’s a severe condition with him to the point where he doesn’t care about treating some classes if people as less than human. What he does makes some of us sick. We can’t stand to see other people hurt unnecessarily. But a lot of Trump voters don’t have a problem with that. They lack empathy and they have a sense of entitlement. So they makes excuses for behavior that should be completely unacceptable
            It may be hard to take but we need to face this.
            Also, Pence is almost worse.

          • RD, well said

      • I don’t believe they think it through that far. They’re looking for a daddy figure who will tell them what to do and solve all their problems for them. They’re suckers for tough guy posturing.

        • Mebbe. But that doesn’t mean they don’t feel comfortable with and identify with Trump’s character issues.
          What shocks and angers us doesn’t shock and anger them.

  7. Food for thought.

  8. I tried to listen to the video RD posted but lost interest when the guest started saying how brilliant T was in conning the people to support him or for making them think Hillary was evil. I just don’t want to hear how he won. I want people to beat the drum about how he is a danger to this country and its democracy every minute of everyday. We all saw how unfit mentally he was during the campaign and Hillary warned us but he won. Not through his brilliance alone (if you can call it that — a serial murderer is brilliant in the way he covers his tracks) but through media and other power brokers and arbitrators betraying the public they serve. There was no seriousness and there is still no seriousness about how sick and unfit he is for the job.

    • Not the tangerine $#!+gibbon’s brilliance, PM. The brilliance of his master, Vladimir Satanovich Putin.

      I would be willing to let Trump resign from office and go back to private life, without criminal prosecution, if he would turn state’s evidence on Putin, so that the truth would come out, and then the GOP would have no choice but to join the effort to root out Putinist influence from our country.

      As for Putin himself–Ascended Madoka forgive me, but if someday he shared the fate of Mussolini, there would not be enough Dr Pepper and pepperoni-and-Canadian bacon pizza on this planet for me to celebrate properly.

      • Oops, I only meant to boldface “if” between “prosecution” and “he”.

        I can haz edit feechur, plz? 😛

      • Exactly! Without Putin things would not have got done the way it went.

  9. I thought I was a well adjusted immigrant before T. I didn’t doubt that I would get a normal response i my day to day interactions with other people. I am the kind of person who will go up to anybody and say something, usually something nice and complementary or some observation I think is interesting and appropriate. Now my interactions with the “whites” in my day to day goings on have become tentative (my hubs and I were discussing this very same thing only yesterday). I am on guard (like RD says) and I don’t like it one bit. And I am confused when people are normal and nice and decent. Am I supposed to feel relieved and maybe even grateful? FUCK.TRUMP.

  10. I don’t think they’re stupid. They just don’t want anyone or anything to get in their way.

    Put another way, they are afraid they will lose their “advantage”.


    • Yes. I must sometimes remind myself not to blame Bubba and Bobbie Sue for this mess, but rather, their wealthier cousins in suburbia and beyond.

      And of course, ultimately blame Vladimir Satanovich Putin (h/t Joe Cannon for the term).

    • There are some suggestions there for how to deal effectively with a narcissist. There’s a lot on NPD, CNPD, BPD etc. on the internet, and most of it is overly simplified and, as a result, not all that practically useful. I believe the most fervent followers of DT have a covert narcissistic disorder–they need to idealize someone (usually an exhibitionistic narcissist) in order to feel any sense of self-worth. If that idealized person fails them (by being a person they are unable to idealize anymore no matter how much distortion they employ), they’ll turn on him immediately and completely. They will destroy him.

      • Let’s hope it happens soon.
        But somehow, I think this is going to drag on a lot longer than we would like.

        • I agree. Today’s Trump feed (the cabinet ‘meeting’ AKA adoration session of vending machines) was a great illustration of what’s going on.

          I’ve been traveling last 3 weeks to Trump country. I saw one big Trump sign in a field, and one bumper sticker.

  11. I have been pointing out that the GOP has a huge problem since at least 2008 and it’s why I thought back then Obama’s post partisan unity pony nonsense was going to lead us to disaster. Now here we are. Maybe because I live in a deep red district I have long thought these people are beyond redemption. They still cannot accept that George W. Bush lied to the entire country about there being WMD’s in Iraq. You cannot reason with a cult member. These particular people have to be defeated at the polls again and again.

  12. Putin, like Fred Trump (the tangerine gibbon’s sire), is a vicious–though unfortunately, intelligent–piece of white trash who, by the will of some fallen angel or malignant pagan god, got above his proper station in the world.

    • It is truly life imitating art, like villains in a Bond movie trying to disrupt and ruin civilizations.

      • That is exactly what Putin wants to do. He knows an intact NATO, an intact European Union, and a strong USA will block his ambitions.

        Unlike the ideologically intoxicated Repugnants, Putin knows that Repugnant economic and social policies are pure follies, which will weaken the USA gravely.

        Hence, to a certain extent, any Repugnant president would have done for his purpose of weakening the USA. Most of the Repugnant candidates, however, were too establishmentarian to be talked into disassembling NATO.

        He chose Cheetolini as his stooge because Cheetolini could be talked into disassembling NATO. Of course, if Putin does have blackmail material on Cheetolini, that would give Putin far greater incentive to install Cheetolini as “our” president.

        • President Putin would like to thank the Stupid White Folks of Real Murka ™ and the Purity Ponies (also mostly white, lest we forget) for making this possible.

  13. O.M.F.G! Ok watch the first and then the second.. Does not make me happy that the great nation has been reduced to this. But we will correct course.

    • It probably sounded better in the original Korean. 😉

      • The first one, that is.

      • Holy Ascended Madoka preserve us, he really is a child, in terms of psychological development.

        • Speaking of childishness, I went Web-slumming recently, and found that a certain circus performer still fails to realize that “Creepy ex-friend turned blogstalker” is not a good look for him. 😛

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