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Republican “Muslim Under the Bed” Debate

monster_under_bedCNN says the kid’s table debate for the Republicans is going on now. I’m not terribly interested. The main event starts at 8:30pm. Why the Republicans need so many debates in order to not talk real policy is beyond me. Ok, not really. They’re going  to be on the tube as much as possible from now until Nov 2016 because the media wants us to hear them constantly, even if we are not supposed to take them seriously.

Well, *most* of us will not take them seriously.

Oh, look! France rejected it’s right wing nationalist party after a terrorist attack! Gee, if only we could reject guys like that in our own country…. {{sigh}}  A girl can dream.

Anyway, I think we can all expect both debates to feature all kinds of scary scenarios featuring Muslims. So, I am proposing my own scenario for this one called, The Muslim under the Bed. What would your favorite candidate do? Here’s how it goes:

It’s 2am and you wake up with an urgent need to pee. Suddenly, you hear a scuffling noise from under the bed. You are sure there is a Muslim under there with a long knife waiting to cut your head off. What do you do?

A.) You go for it. You jump out of bed and run to the door, fling it open, run to the bathroom, slam the door shut loudly and lock the door behind you hoping you reach the loo before Ahmed does.

B.) You decide to hold it. You breathe very softly so that you fool the Muslim into thinking you are still asleep. It’s only a few hours to sunrise and when the sun comes up, the Muslim will disappear.

C.) Very carefully you slide your hand under your pillow for your AK-47, do a quick maneuver you have been practicing for just this eventuality, aim your gun under the bed and shoot the cat.

Commence the collective trembling and live blog here.

 

6 Responses

  1. All jihadists are Muslims
    Hmmm, do they all have beards?

  2. Lindsay Graham shoots the cat.

  3. Rick says the Caliph is like the Pope. Except no one listens to the pope.
    so, there’s that.

  4. It’s really scary when Rand Paul comes across as the sane one.

  5. I listened to a bit of the debate on the way home from work. Did any of the former Democratic debate panelists or participants rip George W. Bush the way President Obama was? Hugh Hewitt was especially bad as just about every question was prefaced with an Obama slander. Of course the audience ate it up being the Teabagger Morans they are.

  6. kjasjksafjksaf

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