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I gotta be me!!! A message for lefty blogospherian Democratic loyalists

Last night, I introduced this site to Vi Hart, the absurdly young mathemusician who produces brilliant math videos for the Khan Academy and YouTube.  And sometime during the night, 2:28am EST, to be exact, someofparts, an infrequent commenter, but one I hope will return more frequently, attempted to post another of Vi’s videos in the comment section. She was unsuccessful, but I have remedied that by careful editing.  The Vi Video she recommended is so important that I thought it is worth sharing on the front page.  So, here it is.  This video is for every lefty blogospherian Democratic loyalist who has decided to tailor the message for the commenters or other lefty blogospherian Democratic loyalists:

I didn’t know that when I tried to follow this advice that I would end up in the Oort Belt of the blogosphere, even farther away from the rest of the political world I knew than I was four years ago.  And on occasion, I’ve wondered whether I should have been more accommodating or commercial (I won’t lie, being on more blogrolls would have helped me get that 27″ apple Thunderbolt monitor I actually need.  No, really, I need better hardware for the other stuff I do.).  But I just felt that as nauseatingly repetitive and obnoxious as I sounded, I would rather be me and put it all out there as I see it than go chasing after readers.  Many readers have come and gone, mostly gone, but I gotta be me.

At some point, I realized that it was never my intention to follow the crowd or have the crowd follow me.  I write this stuff because someone has to.  Someone has to say what happened to the New Deal Democrats who were silenced in 2008.  Someone has to say what it’s like to be a formerly middle class professional who is being forced into self employment by the 1% and their Wall Street minions.  Someone has to document what happened to the research industry in New Jersey.  Someone has to explain what it’s like to be a female in 2012 who came of age in the 70s and 80s and has seen the scope of her gender’s opportunities suddenly shrink.  Someone has to act as an intermediary between the fundamentalist mind and the mind of the political junky (because this shit is real and it’s just now dawning on you how irrational it is, isn’t it?).

So, as I’ve said before, I’ll keep doing this even if I’m the only person reading it.  I’m not going to cater to my audience.  This is a blog after all, a “web log”.  It’s a journal.  Someday, probably after I’m dead, maybe someone will rediscover this hypergraphic diarrhea and decide that it has commercial value and it will make me famous a la Van Gogh.  Did Vincent paint his wheat fields and starry nights while thinking to himself, “This canvas is going to cost $40 million dollars someday and *this* one is going to be priceless.  Damn, why does it take so long for art to appreciate?  I’m almost out of cognac.  Maybe if I do something more accessible and commercially more profitable…”

You’re probably thinking, “{{snort}} She’s really dreaming if she believes that anyone will consider her writing to be some kind of masterpiece.”  Actually, that’s what *I’m* thinking.  But whatever my megalomaniacal brain or my insecure mind elf is thinking at any one time, I just gotta be me.  What else can I be than who I am?  I’m not interested in memeorandum or where I am in the blog rankings or whether I can attract advertisers (though, in retrospect, that might have gotten me that monitor by now… hmmm…).  If I don’t say it my way and relate to the reader my thoughts, then those thoughts will lose what little value they possess.  The left blogosphere may have decided that it’s better to not fight back because they’re scared or because it’s profitable or because getting hundreds of comments on a post is mind-blowingly flattering and makes the poster feel like the king of the world.  But if you’ve had to modify your message to one that you think is more palatable to your audience or one that will assure that the 1% will still employ you or so that your thoughts conform to be the same as the group to which you plan to belong because you think they are more important than you since everyone is paying attention to them, then part of the “you-ness” just got tossed away.

So, welcome to the Oort Belt.  Thanks for stopping by.  Yes, it’s pretty much always like this.  Yes, eventually I’ll get back to writing political snark, when I’m ready and the mood hits me.  You can’t force good snark.  There will probably be a lot of posts about things you may not be interested in or even knew about but that’s part of the journaling process, I guess.  I am a middle aged researcher, liberated from a dying industry that was murdered with the help of Wall Street, living in New Jersey, a child of the working class who rose into the most heavily taxed stratum of the middle class (and still remained a liberal Democrat) only to discover that to the 1%, we’re all working class, who is documenting what it’s like to be on the way back down, interpreting the fevered dreams of some of her fundamentalist relatives and trying to find the thread of her old Democratic party in the current political environment.

Take it or leave it.  And it looks like a lot of you still take it.  We’re not that far from 12,000,000 unique page hits and while the rate of unique page hits has decelerated significantly in the past four years, and we may never actually get to 12,000,000, like some infinite series concept that Vi Hart delights in talking about rapidly, 12,000,000 hits is way more than I ever expected.  Somewhere out there, some of you are thinking about strange ideas and concepts and relationships without your consent.  You may have been infuriated when you first read them here and now they’re lodged in your brain cells, and you can’t get them out.  They’re bumping up against other neurons and making new connections.  Bwahahahahahahhhhhh!  “That’s sick!”, you think, but it’s too late.  The meme has been passed to a new generation.  Whatever happens to it after this is out of my control.  But controlling you was never my intention in the first place.  I’m just a blogger.  No one special but as special as everyone who writes and has a right to write and be heard and think and spew random political stuff.

Thanks for reading.

28 Responses

  1. Wow. Thanks for exposing me to the vid, which is really thought-provoking, and the underlying message. It really strikes a chord so much for me in political terms, because so much of the left blogosphere seems about packaging, accommodation, “realism” and not “purism,” not saying what you actually think or believe but only discussing “what works.” They became what they beheld is such a powerful message, because just focusing on the audience or the world as it is means that you accommodate to it and won’t change it. Saying what you actually think, ESPECIALLY if that’s at odds with the way the world is, creates at least a small chance that light bulb will go off for at least one other person in a way that it wouldn’t if you just said the same old thing over and over again, not because you felt it but because you thought that’s what people expect to hear. I’m rambling but that’s because (like all cool thoughts) this one has me babbling like it released something new, original, creative, not sterile, dead, limp, expected. Thanks!

  2. You must be a pretty powerful, six armed, blue skinned goddess to have birthed both Sky Dancing and The Crawdad Hole.
    I’m so glad you’re still you and this site is still The Confluence, not the Klownfluence.
    So many others have gone coo-coo-cachoo.
    Love ya, Riverdaughter.

    • No, its just that after being insulted and ridiculed, people ran to other blogs are like sky dancing, etc… to escape the madness and senseless hate that RD continues to display for Obama.

      • Oh my! We seem to have touched a nerve over at SkyDancing. I can’t imagine why. A bit of insecurity going on there?

    • She didn’t birth sky dancing, dakinkat did.

  3. And we’re so glad that you have to be you.
    You must be a pretty powerful, six armed, blue skinned Goddess to have birthed both Sky Dancing and The ——–Hole.
    You’ve remained sane and true while others have gone coo-coo cachoo.
    Love ya, Riverdaughter.

    • That’s a novel thought.

    • Why don’t you just suck RD’s ass Sweet Sue? She loves to think she’s smarter than everyone else. But since she lost her job, she’s gone bonkers. She twists reality regularly and if anyone questions or disagrees, they are abused here. That’s the real reason her viewership has dropped off and people have gone to other blogs!

      • Your trolling has become tiresome. You may NOT touch my monkey. :mrgreen:


      • And yet, here you are. Still reading reading reading. Still watching to see who has gone and who has remained. The strange attraction must be powerful, yes?

  4. RD:
    I have to seriously digest the video. It reminds me of some writing in my younger days under the influence of some good “Maryjane”; just to find out the morning after to be crap.

    Today is Hillery’s 65th birthday. I just wanted to sing her Happy Birthday on your blog.

  5. I like the vistas here in the Oort Belt. TC is one of the few places I still check in on everyday.

    I find it so disconcerting to watch other bloggers who used to be on the same page, so to speak, veer right, as if that is going to help us of the 99%, or go soft on the Democratic party because they have been frightened by the same old “Roe vs Wade – lesser of the two evils” bullcrap.

    Thank you for what you do! And you may be surprised at how many there are of us floating out here in the nether regions.

    • Perhaps the blogs and bloggers and bloggreaders in the Oort Belt could all find eachother and start self-and-cross identifying as the OortRoots.

  6. Riverdaughter…

    Just keep up the good work…

    Our National Nightmare will soon be over…
    Followed immediately, of course, by a New National Nightmare…

    • Here’s a little webpost that might put some fresh depth and color in your nightmares, called Springtime For Atta. It’s about a significant Nazi presence in parts of the Republican Party. Not basement cheeto “neo-nazis”. Real nazi NAzi nazis rescued from justice in Europe and brought to America to be held in “ready-reserve” in case a significant fascist movement could be revived here or elsewhere.
      If the facts are correct and the analysis is sound, what does that make the Republican Party? And what would that make Obama for collaborating with the Republican Party? Our first “Pierre Laval” Vichy Democrat President?

      The link: http://rigorousintuition.blogspot.com/2006/03/springtime-for-atta_31.html

  7. The time is now. Everyone who checks in here is in a position to influence at least one person to think and act.

  8. I still visit most days. I hope the archeologists or whatever only pick up the posts 😉

  9. This is a sure sigh the Holiday season is approaching. Over the years , mass layoffs have become a treasured holiday tradition

    Dow Chemical to cut 2,400 jobs, close 20 plants


  10. At some point I realized there are a million blogs. A hundred thousand of them are good blogs. Ten thousand of them must be excellent blogs. One thousand must be El Supremo Excelente blogs.
    I can’t read a thousand blogs. So I target my time to a few and sometimes wander around to find new ones as old ones end or decay.

    Some of those other blogs are in the spirit of this one: true to self whether anyone reads them or not . . . and with that made very clear at the outset, hoping someone does read them. Here are three I read somewhere between every day and every so often.
    Ran Prieur. Ran Prieur is a meaner tougher leaner hippy for today’s meaner tougher leaner times of today. He archives very little and often warns his readers to copy what they like because he won’t guarantee what gets saved. http://www.ranprieur.com/
    Contrary Goddess. Contrary Goddess lives on a hill farm in East Tennessee and blogs about her life and survival methods on the farm together with philosophical speculations/observations this leads her to.
    Her blog is called Life On The Farm. http://contrarygoddess.blogspot.com/
    Sometimes I visit a blog called Violent Acres (Like You but with Poor Impulse Control). It is her observations and/or advice on aspects of life and stuff. (It is not her fault that some redditroll called himself “violentacres” before getting evicted from Reddit. She pre-existed him by years). http://www.violentacres.com/

    • These sound interesting — I love it when people share new (to me) places.

      • I hope you find them hi-valu. They certainly seem hi-valu to me. Maybe that just says something about me, but I think the first two, especially Ran Prieur, are highly info-dense as well as being full of interesting speculation. The third (Violent Acres) offers a very unique viewpoint very uniquely expressed.

  11. Yours was a place I found back during the “Rise of the O’Bot’s” and the war that followed,back in 07/08.And from the very beginning I was always made to feel welcomed.

    Many have come and gone since then but I have always returned….

    I have ventured out since then…traveling to other parts of the vast Internet but I always come back to the place that always felt like a home to me…..The Confluence!

  12. I read your blog every day and plan to keep on reading it as long as you put in the time to keep it going.

    New Deal Dem who came of age in the 70s? We may have been separated at birth.

  13. You’d have more readers if you let those with slightly different viewpoints weigh in. You became anti-Obama above all else and frankly, it’s hard to come here as a liberal and read more anti-Obama poo than there is at Red State.

    But it seems like that’s the way you like it so . . .

  14. Taking another look at BSisBS’s first comment up above, I am struck by the strange reason he/she offers as to why people might have stopped reading this blog.

    “BSisBS, on October 29, 2012 at 4:34 am said:
    No, its just that after being insulted and ridiculed, people ran to other blogs are like sky dancing, etc… to escape the madness and senseless hate that RD continues to display for Obama.”

    really? reeeeealllly? I am awfully new to this blog, but I don’t believe this blog was founded on Obamalove and then lost readers by turning to Obamahate. Also, I haven’t seen Riverdaughter hating Obama. I have read her criticising and disrespecting Obama for various reasons, but not expressing the sort of intense dislike for Obama which I have expressed and will express again, no doubt.

    My dear BSisBS, can you show examples of Riverdaughter’s Obamanalysis which are fact-free and/or senseless-hate driven? I will read them with all deliberate regard if you can point to them. Can you name some other people who left this blog because it was not probama enough or showed insufficient Obamalove? I’m pretty new here, as I have noted. I will look at any examples you can offer.

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