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About those Republican candidates- Who gives a f&*#

The horse race coverage is in full stride now.  It’s been neck and neck for the last couple of months, along with a ridiculous number of debates.  First, one candidate is ahead, then another.  One opens a sizeable lead, only to fall back due to something he failed to keep hidden, or bad science.

Let’s take a look at some of these contenders, shall we?

Herman Cain- A businessman who presumably believed that the government should be run like a business.  He’s successful in his pizza biz, why not take that success to Pennsylvania Ave?  Well, for one thing, he’s not a politician and he’s made some really cringeworthy mistakes on the trail.  Not knowing China had nukes? The only thing positive about that is that he doesn’t seem to know anything about China.  Unlike Huntsman, but we’ll get to that in a sec.  And then there are the ladies.  You have to say that like Demitri Martin.  “Ladies“.  A man who thinks he can keep that a secret during a presidential campaign doesn’t have the master manipulator’s fibbing streak to match his gigantic ego.

Newt Gingrich- Everything you need to know about this guy is in his pamphlet on how to manipulate the public during a political campaign using words.  You don’t need to know anything else.

Mitt Romney- One word,”Bakelite“.

Michelle Bachmann- For all we know, she’s a stealth candidate.  She may only look like a fanatic.  She may only be faking her ignorance of how vaccines work.  She may not really mean what she says about destroying the social safety net.  She might really be a bra burning, pro-choice, feminazi who once she has attained power will usher in a new era of equality for women.  Don’t think this possibility hasn’t crossed Rush Limbaugh’s mind.

Rick Santorum- Googling his name doesn’t really tell you anything about him.  So, let me just say that he’s got a house in Penn Hills where I went to high school and he has a respectable number of children for a strict Roman Catholic, which means he has had sex at least seven times.  He probably would have gone to my grandparents’ church where I attended mass when I stayed with them.  I find this much physical proximity to Santorum unsettling.  {{shivver}}

Ok, who else we got?

Rick Perry- Is he really as stupid as he sounds?  He makes George W. Bush sound like mensa material.

Ron Paul- He named his kid “Rand”.  Fergawdssakes, people, RAND!

John Huntsman- another potential stealth candidate.  And a Mormon.  Where did all of these Mormons come from all of a sudden.  Former moderate Republican governor from Utah.  Also, a wealthy scion to a chemical company.  Who was appointed to be ambassador to China by Barack Obama.  What was he doing over there?  Trying to set up new ways to ship the STEM work overseas?  Seriously, I want to know why a guy whose family runs a chemical company was spending time in China on official US business, especially since we have seen a tidal wave of jobs flood there.  Do I trust him?  Not until I see what his mission was.  Cough it up.

Well, it’s not like I’m going to be voting Republican anyway.  It’s not that the candidates bother me so much, except for Newt who I suspect has a real talent for evil.  And not the kind of evil you may first suspect.  I mean evil on a world class scale.  Which is why fundagelical apocalyptic christians will flock to him.  They’ll overlook his infidelities and tax evasion.  The idea that he might be the catalyst that brings on Armageddon will make them breathe heavily and schedule appointments to have their nails done before The Rapture.

The problem isn’t with the candidates, it’s with Republican voters.  They’re not right.  I mean, they’re “tetched”, if you get my drift.  They cheer for misfortune and applaud for death.  They’re like the crowd at the Colliseum, shrieking in orgasmic frenzy for the blood of innocents who were stupid enough to get caught by the Romans.   And they’re motivated.  When it comes right down to it, they don’t really care all that much who their nominee is.  When they get the signal, they will vote in lockstep for whoever that person is.  That person’s job is to knock Obama out of the White House.  He might have faced this kind of opposition anyway but he made it easy for them to want to do it because he’s been so bad at his job.

The Republicans know it.  You know it.  The campaign operatives on both sides know it.  We can all see the train sliding off the tracks and can anticipate the wreck.  But the only party (as of today) that can avoid catastrophe is closing its eyes and praying.

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29 Responses

  1. stock up on popcorn. 😆

  2. Ok, let me ask you a question, RD. What do you think of our current president, BO? Because by the way you wrote the aricle, BO will surely win this election cycle.

    • I don’t like Republicans and I don’t subscribe to the idea that the enemy of my enemy is my friend. I don’t hate Obama because of who he is as a person. I just despise the entire DNC apparatus who got him into office at a time when we needed a real leader, which he most definitely is not. I *do* want him to lose but not to a Republican. And any politician who has been paying attention to the occupy movement has to realize that there are a lot of votes left on the table right now.
      If Obama loses, I don’t have a problem with that. I’m not afraid of Republicans. I just don’t think they are good people.
      Keep your eyes open for a third possibility.

  3. The current Republican party is what happens when the inmates take charge of the asylum. This shit is literally insane!

  4. Homemade yogurt recipe experiment number 3:

    Experiment 1: whole milk and a cup of an unfamiliar brand of whole Greek yogurt. The yogurt fermented in the automatic yogurt machine for 8 hours. It was ok, but oddly enough, it was more sour than I expected and was fairly runny. I don’t like stiff yogurt but the runniness was unappetizing. I also heated the milk on the stove and let it cool to room temperature according to the directions that came with the machine. But letting the milk sit to cool violated my sense of safety.

    Experiment 2: I used UHT 2% milk and Fage 2% Greek yogurt. I sterilized a pitcher and mixed the milk and yogurt in it. This time, I did not heat the milk. I used it straight from the box. Since is is ultra pasteurized, it already meets the requirements to denature the milk proteins as well being sterile. The yogurt fermented for 10 hours to take into account the lower fat content of the milk. The result was a better, creamier tasting yogurt with less tang but it was still unappealingly runny.

    Experiment 3: UHT 2% milk, Fage 2% Greek yogurt, 1/2 cup non-fat dry milk, 1 teaspoon unflavored gelatin bloomed in about 1/4 cup milk. The nonfat milk and gelatin should boost the body of the yogurt without making it too solid. All containers and stirring equipment were thoroughly sterilized. Automatic timer set to 10 hours. Fingers crossed.

    • When I was a teen I used to ferment yogurt on top of my dad’s vacuum-tube amplifier. Imagine how well that went over.

      • I’ve read recipes where people have fermented it in a slow cooker or the oven or even coolers filled with hot water. And that’s fine if you have a large family and everyone eats yogurt. In my house, it’s only me. Brook won’t touch it. Shes a very picky eater. So, I have to make sure the 7 containers of yogurt aren’t going to turn on me before the end of the week. Come to think of it, the plastic caps for the glass jars have been sterilized but I might do it again before i label them and put them in the fridge. Nothing worse than blue yogurt.
        Once I made it accidentally by leaving a cup of milk on the counter on a warm summer day. Looked and felt just like yogurt. But I wasn’t going to eat it. Nope. I do have limits.

        • Must be the biologist in you. Early man played a little more fast & loose so that’s how we found beer and leavened bread amogst other delights.

          • I guess I’m just not as desperate or starving as early man. And, yeah, brew up ecoli and insect cells over a year and you get a real appreciation for how fast those critters grow. We used to brew a couple of liters at a time and then when we had coaxed them to make protein, lysed the cells and spun it all down in a centrifuge. You get pellets of bacterial matter. I used to be amazed at what an inoculation of a tiny colony could do. You can’t be too careful. I’m a lot more cautious with my yogurt these days.

    • Experiment 3 should work to achieve the standard firmness, Your dry ingredients act in a similar to adding flour when you bake something. A bit of sugar- especially if you can get the more natural cane/palm sugar (Jaggery) will also help firm it. (and sweeten it but with a more molasses-like flavor than our refined sugar taste)

      • I have some cane sugar in my fridge. Picked it up in the Latin American foods section of my grocery store. But I don’t like sugar in my yogurt because I’m planning to make stuff like raita. Sugar will ruin it.

    • My mom used to ferment it on the oil furnace in the basement.

  5. Shame on you! Bakelite is cool! Mitt Romney is, never has been and never will be cool.

    • No, he’ll never be cool. But he does have that glossy finish, smooth edges and perfect hair that does not move. If you like the look of a mass produced iconic figurine, mitt’s your guy.

  6. Oops, that should have read “Mitt Romney is not, never has been and never will be cool.

  7. My feeling is that TPTB (the 1%) is betting on Obama this cycle. After all, they funded his 2008 run to the tune of 1 billion – this should keep for more than 4 years! the conventional wisdom is that if Romney is nominated, Obama loses, but he has a good chance against any of the more obviously crazy candidates. So, look who the media props in the near future: any non-Romney nod is a nod to Obama. personally, I expect things to worsen no matter what puppet the 1% install.

    • Imo most people in the 1% aren’t attaqched to any one single outcome or plan. They (excuse the expression) hedge their bets. Whoever wins in 2012, will deliver something they want. GOP gifts are obvious — DINO gifts less obvious.

      A DINO can do more damage to FDR’s net than the GOP could….

    • Yeah? I wouldn’t be too sure of that. Newt might be setting himself up as the bad cop in order for the Republican base to see mitt as the logical alternative. Except that what Newt is saying, crazy as it might sound, is what the base wants to hear. What’s really funny is that Glenn beck is trying to dial it back. He must have had an, “oh, shit!” moment. But it’s too late. The malevolence and dark evil things in human beings has been given permission to play for too long.
      And I am totally serious about the fundies. They want “this system of things” to end and if they think they can count on newt to behave badly, they’ll vote for him. Go back and watch that John Dominic Crossan video on the dangers of fundamentalism. God may be working too slowly for these people. They might want to take steps to speed things up.
      The other Republican candidates would be bad enough because it would be 4 more years of the same crap we already have had for the last 12 years. But newt? I dunno. Could newt stop himself from himself? Or would he be a bit like the sorcereor’s apprentice alone with the wand with a whole army of brooms to command?
      Newt has an abnormal prefrontal cortex or something. He could be dangerous if he thought he had a receptive audience.

  8. I beg to differ on the topic of Googling Rick Santorum: I believe it tells you everything you need to know about him. 😀

  9. “Newt who I suspect has a real talent for evil. And not the kind of evil you may first suspect. I mean evil on a world class scale.”

    I don’t have such a strong opinion of any individual usually, but I tend to agree with this! Dunno from Armageddon, but his behavior to the Clintons in the 90s was — despicable. He opposed all the good that Bill was doing. It’s not just the panty sniffing excuse he used to impeach Bill — but that he impeached Bill at all!

  10. ” A man who thinks he can keep that a secret during a presidential campaign doesn’t have the master manipulator’s fibbing streak to match his gigantic ego.”

    Or it could indicate that he’s innocent of the sex charges, and Obama’s team (or the media) has been dragging $100 dollar bills through … somewhere.

  11. … Off topic (but related to a previous topic) It’s pretty clear that I’m gonna have to start watching pole dancing videos.

    That’s all.

  12. If you know anyone who has the slightest intention of voting for Gingrich, you must give them this link.

    http://bit.ly/vfTrkd

    Stephen Pizzo:

    Okay, so there I was trying to fall asleep last night and this terrifying image materialized in my mind, and I just had to share my pain:

    President Newt
    and
    First Lady, Callista Gingrich

    You must see the picture!

  13. Tricky Ricky’s Pennsylvania residence a two bedroom bungalow in the Penn Hills school district. That must have been interesting when all nine of the Santorum family came home from Washington.

    OT: I’ve been thinking of making up pledge cards to send back in those contribution envelopes the Democrats will be sending to me over the next year.

    It would be something like this:

    $5 for every Wall Street crook investigated by the Obama DOJ.

    $10 for every Wall Street crook working in the Obama administration brought to justice.

    $25 for every caucus replaced with a one person one vote primary.

    $50 for eliminating Super-delegates.

    $100 for every candidate to primary Obama in 2012.

    • That’s a great idea.

    • I yelled and swore so much at the Democratic party campaign people in the past couple of years that they have stopped calling me.
      Or maybe it’s because i disconnected my phone.

    • My reply to Democratic contribution requests is very simple: “Contact me again when Hillary Clinton is at the top of the 2012 ticket. Until then — 0!”

      Roz in NJ/NYC

    • No, for getting Superdelegates to do their job better next time. They were the main hope for out-voting Obama’s phony red state caucus delegates.

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