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Barack Obama Meets America: A Play In One Sad Act.

Barack Obama Meets America: A Play In One Sad Act.

A Special Guest Post by madamab
Originally produced at Oooh, nuance!

THE SCENE: Senator Barack Obama and America are seated in a large auditorium. Obama is sitting on the stage in a folding chair. A door in the back is marked “THIS WAY TO HILLARY CLINTON’S PLACE.” Another door reads “VOTE FOR JOHN MCCAIN.”]

AMERICA: Welcome, Senator Obama! We are soooooo ready to elect a Democrat this year, and we loved, loved, LOVED your speech at the Democratic National Convention in 2004. You are such an eloquent and intelligent guy…and your charisma is amazing! We are looking so forward to getting to know you better!

OBAMA (smiling): That was a wonderful welcome! Thank you, America!

AMERICA: No, thank YOU. We have some great candidates this year, and you’re one of them! So, tell us. Why should we elect you President of the United States?

OBAMA (standing up and pacing): Aren’t you tired of the same old Washington politics? Well, so am I. I’m not really a politician – I’m something new and different! I will unify all Americans so that we can work together to make our country a better place. We will finally get out of this partisan gridlock that has been preventing us from moving forward. Just believe in me and we can make it happen together! Yes, we can!

AMERICA: Oooh! That was really inspirational! [Iowa faints and Obama throws her a water bottle he just happens to have with him.] Okay, so tell us: How are you going to accomplish this?

OBAMA (smiling): Hey, don’t worry about that. All my policy proposals are on my website. You can tell I’m smart, right? I was the editor of the Harvard Law Review! Trust me, I know what I’m doing. I was right about Iraq, wasn’t I? And remember that Hillary voted for the AUMF. The Iraq war wouldn’t have happened without her!

[OBAMA’S CHAIR TURNS INTO A THRONE.]

[AMERICA mutters a bit. New Hampshire gets up and walks toward the CLINTON door.]

OBAMA: Hey, New Hampshire, where are you going?

NH: [at the door] Sorry, Senator – we like Hillary better. We prefer experience to soaring rhetoric. Plus, she seems like she really understands what we need and has a plan to make it happen.

OBAMA: I understand what you need! You need ME! I am a post-racial, post-partisan, unifying guy! How can you go for the same old politics? [NH IS GONE.] Uh, wait! Did you know that Bill and Hillary are racists?

AMERICA: [gasps] That’s awful! [90% of AA America stands up, chanting “Yes we can!”]

OBAMA: Ah, that’s better. [Florida, Michigan, New York, California and New Jersey get up and leave, shaking their heads.] Where are you guys going?

THE STATES [at the CLINTON door]: We like Hillary and we know her. You are new and inspiring, but you’re not giving us any reason to vote for you instead. We blame the war on Bush, not Hillary, and it’s not like you’ve done anything differently than she has since you’ve been in the Senate. Bye – good luck in the rest of the states!

OBAMA: [to the remaining states] Hey, folks, don’t let them bother you. They get down, periodically, and their claws come out. I’ll get her voters, but I’m not sure she’ll get mine. They’ll all vote for me in November. Yes, we can!

REVEREND WRIGHT COMES ON STAGE.

WRIGHT: Hi, America! I’ve been Barack Obama’s pastor, mentor and friend for 20 years. I baptized his children, I married him and Michelle, and he named his bestselling book after one of my sermons!

OBAMA: Uh-oh. [GETS UP, CROSSES TO REV. WRIGHT, TRIES TO DRAG HIM OFF THE STAGE. WRIGHT IS IMMOBILE AND CONTINUES TO SPEAK.]

WRIGHT: Yes, we are close close close! By the way, did I tell you that my church preaches Black Liberation Theology? And that I made fun of and insulted Bill and Hillary Clinton from the pulpit? And that I said “God Damn America” just a few days after the attacks of September 11th? And that I think the government gave black people AIDS? And that I think Louis Farrakhan is a great guy? And that Italians are garlic noses? Believe it or not, there’s even video of me saying these things!

OBAMA: Who is this man? I am shocked, shocked to hear him talk this way! Well, I admit I’ve heard some controversial stuff from him, but wow – this is really too much! I’m not disowning him but I’m disowning what he said. And by the way, my grandma was a racist! Oh, I mean…not a racist, but a typical white person! Come on, stop bothering me about this stuff. Can’t I just eat my waffle?
OH, TX and PA: Oh, HELL NO. [they get up and start walking towards the CLINTON door]

OBAMA: But wait! I’m the one running for President, not my pastor! [WRIGHT BEGINS EDGING OFF THE STAGE.]

OH, TX and PA [at the door]: Come on, Senator. You’ve got to believe some of what he says, or else why would you be such a devoted follower of this man for 20 years? You don’t share our values, and we know that Hillary does. We’re voting for her.

OBAMA: Ahhhh, who needs you. You’re just bitter, bible-thumping, gun-slinging, xenophobic racists. [TX, OH and PA gasp, then stomp out the door.]

[WRIGHT COMES BACK ONSTAGE AND STEPS IN FRONT OF OBAMA.]

WRIGHT: Hey now! Barack is just saying what he’s saying because he’s a politican. We know this, right, America? Of course he can’t disown me. By the way, isn’t it great when I say how white people have no rhythm, make fun of how they talk, and expound on my theories that they are left-brained and black people are right-brained?

[OBAMA PUSHES WRIGHT OFF STAGE.]

OBAMA: That does it! This man is not who I thought he was. I disown him completely! And by the way, I’m still NOT a politician!

[WEST VIRGINIA gets up, shakes its head, and walks towards the CLINTON door.]

OBAMA: Hey! Where are YOU going?

WV: You’ve gotta be kidding with this Wright guy. And by the way – we are not bitter, ignorant or racist; it’s just obvious you have no idea who we are or what we want from a President. Buh-bye now!

OBAMA: [looking at the auditorium, which is a lot emptier than it was before] Uh, what about the rest of you? You’re with me, right? Hey, Kentucky – look who’s backing me! John Edwards! Did you know, he was the son of a mill worker?

KY: But why should we vote for YOU? John Edwards is not running for President any more.

OBAMA: Because you need change! You need hope! You need faith! See, look – my new flyer says it all!

KY: No, we need jobs. We need solutions. We get hope and faith from ourselves, not from our President. We want Hillary! [KY GETS UP AND WALKS OUT THE CLINTON DOOR.]

OBAMA: [to himself] Well, hell. This is a lot harder than I thought. Maybe I can’t win this thing after all?

[HOWARD DEAN and DONNA BRAZILE step forward. As they do, all the states that left enter through the Clinton door and stand in the back of the auditorium.]

DEAN: Don’t worry, Barack. We’ve got this thing all planned out. You WILL be the nominee no matter what happens. After all, we’ve got the convention scheduled on the same day as Martin Luther King’s “I Have a Dream” speech! Do you think that’s a coincidence?

BRAZILE: Yeah, don’t worry about a thing. I made sure that MI and FL didn’t count so that you could look like a front-runner, instead of following the DNC rules that stated the penalty was a 50% cut in delegates. You’ve got it in the bag!
AMERICA [all together]: WHAT? Are you Democratic Party Leaders saying you don’t care what the voters think – that Obama is your guy no matter what? That’s not democracy at all! What the hell is wrong with you? [ALL THE STATES GET UP AND WALK OUT THE JOHN MCCAIN DOOR. THE AUDITORIUM IS EMPTY.]

[DEAN, BRAZILE and OBAMA look at each other in shocked disbelief.]

OBAMA: What the hell happened? Why didn’t those idiots vote for me? John McCain is just the same as Bush! We Democrats were favored by a huge margin nationally! What is wrong with them – are they racists or something?

[HILLARY CLINTON enters through her door, shaking her head in disgust. BILL CLINTON is with her. They hold hands.]

HRC: Perhaps we can explain it to you.

BILL: You see, the American people don’t like to be talked down to. They like to be asked for their votes, not taken for granted.

HRC: Women didn’t appreciate all the sexism you and your surrogates directed at me. And to call the “first Black President” racist was unforgivable to many.

BILL AND HRC TOGETHER: You never asked them what they wanted or needed. You never listened to them.

BILL: We thought you’d learned the lessons of my Presidency by now. But you’re just as elitist as the Republicans. You threw me and Hillary under the bus, and now you’re paying the electoral price.

[THEY WALK OUT THE CLINTON DOOR.]

DEAN: Well, there’s always 2012, Barack. Hey, how about you and John Kerry?

[LIGHTS OUT.]

172 Responses

  1. Madamab,

    You are a true humorist.

  2. I’ve read it three times and I laugh and cry (in turn) every time.

  3. madamab — thank you so much for letting us post this!

  4. If only it were true.

  5. I’d love to see this posted at the Cheeto, but I wouldn’t want Madamab to have to deal with the stooopid comments. It would be pearls before swine. Or swine clutching pearls. Or something.

  6. I think it’d be very cool to start local productions of this play. You know, as a short play prior to the longer billed play.

    I’m in Los Angeles, and there are tons of theatres, and tons of actors:)

    Awesome job Madamab!

  7. They would swarm like pirhana over there. No criticism of the “presumptive” allowed.

  8. Act 2 – Defendents #1, #2, #3……Guilty on all counts of Fraud, Racketeering………………….., said the Judge.

  9. Hey Pat, everything is true and the ending tho’ yet to be is foreseen accurately here. The next act looks very scary, either way.

  10. “Can’t I just eat my waffle?”

    ———-

    Tee hee. That one never gets old.

  11. My only complaint is that MA and RI were left out of the Super Tuesday part.

  12. Oops, RI was on March 5. But you know what I mean.

  13. Another one bites the dust….is this art imitating life, or life imitating art? You are so insightful madamab….and much appreciated!!

  14. Thanks guys! I am so thrilled that you posted this. 🙂 Thanks, katiebird and bostonboomer!

  15. Madamab,

    You deserve a wide audience. I know I will be checking your blog from now on.

  16. Bravo! I second Marisa’s suggestion about local productions. Especially if we get to throw rotten tomatoes at Obama, Dean and Brazile at the end. I think it’d play well in NY.

  17. I want to be Nancy Pelosi. Just for the wardrobe. And I can blink rapidly and wag my finger too!

  18. Thanks, bostonboomer! Your readership will be much appreciated. 🙂

    stillife – it would play VERY WELL in NY. This is Clinton country! 🙂

  19. Absolutely wonderful. Brava!

  20. !!!

    >I think it’d be very cool to start local productions of this play.

    I’m reminded of the NoDa Players (local group) doing Lysistrata in a dive coffee house – early 2003, that would’ve been, before shock ‘n awe – and this little one-act play could be done just like that. Anywhere, anytime.

  21. Carol: Looks like Obama is trying to do to McCain what he did in Chicago. He may be the only one running in November after all!

  22. Do you guys really think this play could be produced? I just wrote it for my own amusement. 🙂

  23. madamab, very clever! kinda creepy how those are all real quotes. they surely have an impact when you put them all together like that. thanks, you did a great job!!

  24. all democratic candidates should be required to read ANIMAL FARM and then be able to explain it.

  25. Produce the play. Do it in Denver!

  26. street theater in Denver outside the convention, or in coffee houses near the convention – that would be so cool!

  27. Madamab,

    I don’t know anything about producing plays, but wouldn’t it be fun as a youtube? And then you could run videos of Obama actually saying those things. I hope Lori reads it. She might have some ideas.

  28. madamab,
    Genius! Pure genuis!!

  29. OOPS! Pure genius!!

  30. All Dem candidates should read the US Constitution and then be able to explain it. Along with the Bill of Rights.

  31. bostonboomer – Youtube would be great! And I love the street theatre ideas.

    Thanks for all the compliments, everyone. It really means a lot. [blushing furiously]

  32. By the way, for whatever it’s worth, in my area, Obama supporters have gone from using the word “Unity” to using the word “Solidarity.” I kid you not.

  33. Thank you for this! My first thought was that it needed to be produced. Great for small theatre.

    This came at a good time for me. Just got off the phone with a friend who is one of “his” supporters. In the past, we agreed not to talk about the election because I thought it would hurt our friendship. Well, tonight was extremely difficult. She gave me the line about Hillary agreeing with the rules, etc. And my friend sees no sexism and doesn’t understand why I’m so hurt! And she’s a woman! I think the world has lost its collective mind! I’m just heartsick all over again! Thanks for letting me vent!

  34. I LOVED THIS PEICE!!!!! You should take it on the road:)

  35. dwwenz – “Solidarity?” More like “Submission.”

    PUMA!

    Lakota in GA – I have three Obaman family members. I feel your pain.

  36. I wasn’t even kidding. You should have it produced by local theatre companies in the swing states. I’m all about strategy this way. Take this to PUMA, I bet they’ll know people.

  37. This guy is not electable. Is he?

  38. I really hope Lori sees it.

  39. Lakota: I feel your pain. Like banging your head against the wall sometimes.

  40. MadamB

    I think that’s something that could be produce. I especially like the idea of each state being represented by an actor. It lost a little momentum by the end but the beginning, the concept, was superb. Brava.

  41. Katiebird; All he needs is 51%.

  42. My brother is a professional film editor. Unfortunately, he is also an Obama supporter, so I can’t ask him for advice. I have avoided even telling him who I voted for, because I just don’t want to hear it.

  43. Pat,

    Now don’t get down in the dumps again. He has to get the winning percentage in a lot of different states. The attack machine hasn’t even kicked in yet and he’s had no bounce whatsoever. After a divided convention, probably with delegates storming off the floor, and then the Republican 527s, he has no chance. He’s toast.

  44. It appears that maybe TMs site has lost its luster. Not too many Obamabots are showing up over there but plenty of Hillary supporters are still weighing in. This was not her plan I don’t think.

  45. Really BostonB? My brother in law is a film editor! It’s fun to hear his stories.

  46. bb: How I would love to believe that theory. But McCain is getting torn to shreds daily and for those “low information” voters Obama may be where they head to. Obama is still not getting the criticism he deserves.

    As I said before, they both deserve it but only one is taking the hits and it is not the empty suit.

  47. Isn’t it sad that we can’t tell our friends and relatives who we voted for? I’m tired of that. I received an e-mail from a Clinton supporter who has jumped on the Obama bandwagon. She sent all the tired old straw men (SCOTUS, R v. W, etc.) to convince me to go with the flow. I told her that I would not fall in line. I said that Howard Dean had lost his way and I was not gong to follow him into the abyss.
    She wrote back, “I’m so sorry.”

  48. Yes, Produce it!

    Maybe add in a song or two:

    my suggestions for a song titles:

    Typical White Person

    Under the Bus

  49. Ideally, you’d want 50 players, each wearing a placard with the state and number of ev’s printed on it. (and maybe a couple of very small (1/2) people representing MI & FL but with HUGE ev numbers on their placards. That should be easy to accomplish, particularly as a street-theater or YouTube production.

    What fun it would be!

    Many kudos & hand-claps to you, madamab! I was totally caught up in the scene, even on first read. 🙂

  50. Hey maybe put Under the Bus to the tune of Under the Sea!

  51. One of my favorite parts is where Iowa faints. And I think you should add the quote that Rendell let slip out accidentally on purpose–about not needing people, just checks.

  52. A vote for Obama would be like giving the trash collector a Christmas gift after he left your trash all over the lawn each week.

  53. McCain has been advertising EVERY HOUR of prime time and into the late night talk shows for at least 2 weeks. His ads are as frequent as any other single product.

    He must have A MILLION dollars. Who advertises in Kansas/Missouri in June?

  54. I agree — produce it. Film it. Get it on YouTube. Viral!!

  55. Pat,

    I swear, I’m going to figure out some way to go back and collect all your clever sayings. I wish I had thought of it sooner.

  56. We can’t forget Jay Z’s 99 problems and b*tch ain’t one!

    I was thinking that the Obama campaign theme song should be either that horrid Jay Z song or the childhood ditty TheWheels on the Bus Go Round and Round.

    But then there is stiff competition from Arcade Fire’s Rebellion Lies, and Foo Fighters The Pretender.

    All of the above could be incorporated into the play:)

  57. SherryNC – That’s how I envisioned it – with one person for each state. I LOVE the ideas of having half people for MI and FL! LOL!

    I just realized that I know a film producer who is NOT an Obama supporter – at least, not that I know of! Maybe I will ask him what he thinks too…

  58. I’m seeing the Caucus states dressed as Munchkins/Lollipop Kids.

  59. Under the bus
    Under the bus
    Darling it’s better
    Down with the motors
    Take it from me
    Up on the campaign they work all day
    Out in the streets they slave away
    While we devotin’
    Full time to layin’
    Under the bus

  60. I third–fourth?–the YouTube idea. Get 50 of your closest Clinton buddies together and do it. I think it could be done. I’d help make it viral if I could.

  61. This is a smidge OT, but who wants to bet on when BO claims credit for this:

    http://english.aljazeera.net/NR/exeres/D75F2413-31B9-4696-A617-E2888493170F.htm

  62. How about:

    You Don’t Bring Me Panders Anymore to the tune of Streisand’s You Don’t Bring Me Flowers Anymore!

  63. I am no fan of rap music. Most of the lyrics are disgusting. Perhaps now that R Kelly has been ‘acquitted” he could whip up some hummable lyrics and put a few campaign songs together. With international gestures.

  64. WS

    YES!!!! a musical….lol. seriously, madamab, that was great….great idea of the “flash” theater, especially in denver. just put on spontaneous productions in the streets and at parks….

  65. If this play were really to be produced, I wouldn’t mind if things were added or subtracted – like music, or specific lines. It could be like a basic seed that could germinate beautiful flowers. 🙂

  66. That “truce” lasted as long as it took to put out the announcement. Then they started shooting at one another again. But the “Transcender” will deal with this all in good time.

  67. ws !!!!!stop!!!!! you’re killing me…… :0

  68. lol WS, the idea of this as a musical cracks me up. it makes me think of the “Streetcar” musical on the Simpsons – anyone remember that?

    also, the first song I thought of was Weird Al’s “Another One Rides the Bus” parody of “Another One Bites the Dust”

    maybe something along the lines of “Another One Gets Thrown Under the Bus”? but perhaps that would be another play, a sequel

  69. There are so many actors and entertainers looking for exposure, and what a great way for them to get exposure while spreading the message.

    Flash theatre is an excellent venue!

  70. “Money, money, money, must be honey in a rich man’s world!”

  71. This play deserves some Weird Al!

  72. well oh my what a funny post humor and satire it is as true as Swifts “a modest proposal” I salute your literary abilities…I can see your book title “What went Wrong?/how the democrats siezed defeat from the jaws of victroy in 2008”

    It will be a best seller and be required reading for membership on the DNC RBC…

    Fuzzybeargville

  73. WS — you HAVE to see this….under the bus is already set to music…

    this is hilarious…

  74. “…don’t choke on the dust
    under the bus…

  75. madamb you are a genius-really I am fawning all over you
    fuzzybeargville

  76. Or, “God Damn America” sung by Kate Smith and the TUUC chorus.

  77. Yeah, Pat Johnson! You are absolutely hilarious!! I loooove your suggestions.

    Thanks, Michael P Varvel, LOL! [blush]

  78. Ideally, you’d want 50 players, each wearing a placard with the state and number of ev’s printed on it. (and maybe a couple of very small (1/2) people representing MI & FL but with HUGE ev numbers on their placards.

    A couple of pointers…

    if this is produced for you tube, keep it smaller. Having that many people on the stage moving around will slow it down. Just the big states you mention, and then a few like Idaho, Utah, North Dakota holding their tiny little numbers….

    Oh, and have Brazile and Dean stab Michigan and Florida in the back — and have Massachusettts, New Jersey, and California drag them offstage… and when they ‘come back’ the smallest children possible holding the big signs. (Maybe even have a corner of the michigan sign made of something edible — have Brazile break off that piece, take a bite, and hand it to Obama.)

    BTW, madamb, did I mention that this was brilliant!
    ((((((madamb)))))))

  79. gary, lol, that song could be used too. It depends on the tone of the play I think.

    madamab, should definitely take this idea and run with it.

  80. lol, I love Pat’s “God Damn America” song idea, lol

  81. I still want to be Nancy.

  82. This is really funny.

  83. thanks, plukasiak! I am a big fan. {{{plukasiak}}} I wrote this before the RBC decision, so MI and FL had not been totally screwed over yet. LOL

    I am happy to hear all these suggestions! If it were a youtube, I agree – I would only have a few people representing the states.

  84. The person playing Obama should wear a very loose suit, connoting what Obama is–empty and cheap.

  85. Pat Johnson – you are the official Nancy Pelosi of this play! I so decree it! 🙂

  86. Got another idea:

    Obot Paradise to the tune of Coolio’s Gangster’s Paradise.

    As I surf through the valley of the shadow of death
    I take a look at my life and realize there’s nothing left
    Cause I’ve been blastin and trollin so long that
    Even Obama thinks that my mind is gone

  87. Isn’t Carly Simon a Hillary supporter? Maybe we could get her to let us use “You’re so Vain.”

  88. “America, America,
    We turned our sights on thee.
    And carved you out
    And spit you out
    And now comes “unity”.

  89. madamab: I won’t let you down.

  90. When this campaign starts getting me down,
    and preachers are much to much, for me to face
    I stand right up there in front of the press
    And speechify how its all about race!

    Under the bus the only place they;ll go,
    And I just have to wish, to make it so…
    Under the bus…

  91. Brilliant Madamab .. loved it – it’s Perfect . !!

    thank YOU .. !!! . 🙂

  92. only if I can be bill richardson-I come with a nice fuzzy beard- may have to lose a few inches in hieght I hear he is shorter….

    Fuzzybeargville

  93. ooh! can I be Florida! Then I’ll have an excuse to work on my tan instead of cleaning the house! 😉

  94. Great job madamab. You really condensed it down.

  95. bostonboomer and katiebird – I hope you are keeping all these songs and ideas! They are fabulous!

  96. also have to rent a wrinkled suit-cant that bill richardson find a dryckleaner-double plus I could double as Al Gore too…

    Fuzzybeargville

  97. LoL .. on the news re: Israel & Hamas .. Israel has called the news premature .. as usual ..

    I do not have a lot of hope for this .. wish I did ..

  98. Do you know they are doing a big arts for Democracy fair before the convention in Denver? Some of the exhibits sound perfectly Obama.

  99. I refuse to be wexler there are some parts in this drama I just cannot play….

    fuzzybeargville

  100. Every time Dean says something, can he say the last line like YEEEEEAAAA!

  101. plukasiak – Sure! I can cast the entire thing from the Confluence! LOL

    Of course, I’m not sure if we can find someone to play Obama…Booo!!!! Hissss!!!!

  102. If there is stabbing involved….oh no, don’t tempt me…:)

  103. tell me about it fuzzy. I saw his testimony live at the RBC meeting and he was about the smarmiest thing ever. It was all about him…..blechhh

  104. Mawn? art, is it going to be nObama approved art? socialist realism? nationalsocialist realism? Art is about free expression-cant have that at the convention…

    fuzzybeargville

  105. Michael P – You can be Bill Clinton! We will pretend he has a beard. LOL

  106. One side could be fascist, the other could be WPA FDR murals. Hillary is like FDR to me.

  107. FYI-
    Just wanted to let you all know about the virtual candle site.
    A group for Hillary under hrc was started from her Hill campaign site some months ago. The candles only burn for 48 hours, so one has to keep going back to light them. You can sign the candle and leave a message. You can click on a candle to read the message that was left by someone.
    (Sometimes Jr’s trolls invade- but we just ignore them and their candles)

    http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/candles.cfm?l=eng&gi=hrc

  108. Remember MA already experiened the “Axelrod” version of “change” with D. Patrick! That’s why Hillary
    “won” that state by 14%!
    Even on the last day DEMOCRATICS were screaming thru their votes;”NOBAMA WE WANT HILLARY”!
    But the party e-lites IGNORED THEM!!

  109. madamab,
    fantabulous! I truly hope it does get produced.
    and thank you! what a wonderful way to end the evening on a light note.
    hugs

  110. Fuzzy, the fascist art with the family staring optimistically into the sunrise that slowly morphs into the 1984 look a la the movie with John Hurt as the states leave.

  111. Of course, I’m not sure if we can find someone to play Obama…Booo!!!! Hissss!!!!

    well. we certainly could use a puppet… just a head, and and empty suit, tied to strings that “Axelrove” controls…

  112. Pat,

    You’re killing me over here! As Nancy Pelosi, you can announce that a unity ticket is “off the table!” And then explain how you’re neutral.

  113. madamb that means I get to hold Hillary’s hand… I would love this it would be my dream come true…..holding Hillary’s hand is better than $ 7.99 all you can eat steak night at panama joes….mmmmm

    Mawn I loved those WPA murals they were and still are inspired public art…. hillary is FDR with elanor’s wit and intelligence-

    Fuzzybeargville

  114. Why not an empty suit for Obama, with just a disembodied voice?

  115. As for the ending… well, you know his wife said he would never run again. We only get one shot at His Specialness. She doesn’t really like politics, you see.

    http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2007/12/29/obama-my-wife-doesnt-want-another-white-house-run/

  116. mawn the we could fad out to the three slogans from 1984….it would be great with Obama bigbrother face behind the Freedom is Slavery….Ingorance is Strength

    wonderful end….I can hear the cry’s of foul from the bots

    Fuzzybeargville

  117. You know what? I would want a real person for Obama – someone with a lot of charisma and presence. It would be spookier that way.

    But…he could still be tied to Axelrove.

    Hillary is my FDR too.

  118. Here’s more!

    When Wright is on stage, have the Obama(s) start playing Britney Spear’s “Toxic”

    With a gape of your mouth
    I’m on the pew
    You’re toxic I’m slipping under
    With the words of a poison paradise
    I’m addicted to you
    Don’t you know that you’re toxic
    And I love what you do
    Don’t you know that you’re toxic

    Also:

    at the end of the play, have all 50 states start a rousing rendition of “God Damn America” with fireworks (flag burning in background optional).

  119. I will be in complete character as Nancy. The fake smile, the Bambi eyelashes, the smart suit, the pashima over my left shoulder.

    I will be carried onto the stage atop a table and when I get off that will be the allegorical reference to “off the table”. The low information and uneducated crowd will go wild!

    Just hope I don’t upstage anybody.

  120. Could Oprah be convinced to play a dual role? Herself and The One?

  121. OMG Pat – you are PERFECT!

    Do you have the giant pearls too, or will we need to get those from the Costume Director?

  122. Pat, as Nancy, could have a table that she just keeps knocking everything off

  123. Nancy always upstages she mugs for the guy in the 14th row of the balcony like ann bangcroft in to be or not to be
    fuzzybeargville

  124. oooo Pat, you could keep trying to do the tablecloth trick, only do it badly, so everything goes flying off

  125. kiki: Good point!

  126. Actually, I think Oprah could play a great Donna Brazile. 😉

  127. I love ann bankroft hollywood is a poorer place with out missess robinson….

    Fuzzybeargville

  128. madamb you are so on the money there…Oprah as Donna brazile-bingo on that
    fuzzybeargville

  129. you know, if anyone has the talent, this could probably be done animated, which wouldn’t preclude doing it live down the road – like in Denver.

    I just love the idea of street theater outside the convention. but animated films get a lot of play on Youtube.

  130. Who gets to play Rev. Wright? I’m thinking that guy who advertises for Orange Glo.

  131. Thanks Michael P!

    Since we are dreaming…Will Smith=Barack Obama.

    Remember him in Six Degrees of Separation? Same character as Obama – needy, shows a different side to everyone, narcissistic, insincere, all about the money…

  132. I’m thinking of a version of “Under My Thumb” by the Stones, changed to “Under My Bus”

    the problem is the original is creeping me out because it’s actually so Obama regarding Hillary, without changing a word.

  133. mawn the we could fad out to the three slogans from 1984….it would be great with Obama bigbrother face behind the Freedom is Slavery….Ingorance is Strength

    I think the sign should say “Divisiveness is Unity”, “Copying is Leadership”, “Speech is Action”… and as the play progresses, each sign is turned until all three have one of the Orwell slogans….

  134. kiki, scroll up to Gary’s comment above with the link. It is a YouTube of the exact song.

  135. oh gary, after I posted I watched the video – lol! I guess I wasn’t the first with that idea.

  136. Remember this from the Mary Tyler Moore Show about Chuckles the Clown?

    “A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants”.

  137. yeah Mawm, I just saw that 🙂 my youtube was taking forever to load

  138. plukasiak yes that is briliant- of course when the republicans use this as a campaign commercial our collective political carreers are over….I will never be the first gay oops second gay congressman from Florida

    Fuzzybeargville

  139. and the landslide defeat in November it would ensure…dean would be purple with rage….

    fuzzybeargville

  140. OMG, plukasiak! Amazingly smart!

    Wow. You PUMAs are really, really creative. I salute you all!

  141. maybe we could get Barney to play Dean purple with rage

  142. Pat Johnson – ROFLMAO!

  143. JM has a new environmental commercial on his website and it looks like it could have been a Hillary ad. LOL

  144. madamab: Yours was brilliant! We know a good thing when we see it. It perfectly captured the entire essence of this nonsensical primary. Take a bow Madam Playwright!

  145. Hey now the bots are trying to use Social Security as an issue to drive us poor stipid hillacrats back to the fold…..the Roe v Wade thing did not work.

    Fuzzybeargville

  146. yes madamab, I second what Pat said. what made it powerful was putting actual quotes together. outrageous statements made every other week or so don’t have the impact they have when they’re put together in one act.

  147. Well, when they start insisting that Madonna will remain in England forever if we don’t elect Obama I may reconsider. Until then…….

  148. Oprah would be perfect as Donna Brazile. Somehow I don’t think we will get her to do it though. I doubt if we can get Denzel to play Obama either, sad to say.

  149. and publix a chain we have here in florida has a chocolate covered peanut brittle TO DIE FOR…I should not but still celebrating 1 million hits and gay marriage in california- pleas everone tell me I am allowed-

    Fuzzybeargville

  150. Okay everyone, good night, and thanks for all the kind words! Hugs all around!

  151. Yes, Will Smith would be great, but he’ll have to lose some weight and muscle.

  152. oh Michael, go for it. you can diet next week (with me!)

  153. Good night Madamab. Thank you so much for sharing your masterpiece with us!

  154. EXCELLENT IDEAS! There are a couple of things I’d like to contribute to OBAMA THE MUSICAL! (or maybe, ObamaMessiah, Super Star?)
    Reading the skit, I could practically visualize a TAP DANCE that might be choreographed (I tap–of course we’d use professionals.). Brazile and Dean dance in one scene….(dirty dancing?) Gee, Wright already showed us his dance moves at the NAACP! This could be really BIG!

  155. g’nite madamab, and thank you!

  156. Michael,

    Don’t hold back. You deserve it.

  157. Michael, did we miss Kathy Griffith or is that Wed night at 10?

  158. we have Publix here in Alabama too. it’s a great store!

  159. did anyone notice 1.05 million hits we could surpass 2 million hits by independence day ….Riverdaughter I love you- surely you were sent to us by an angel….

    Well tonight I am going to dream of all you my friends making a difference. Pat Johnson I dream of Hillary signing the ENDA and giving you the pen as a momemto in honor of your support of you gay son.

    To mawn she gives you the pen from the signing of the comprensive hate crimes bill that now covers LGBT community.

    Madamb I am sure there is something you would like hillary to sign into law please share it with so so we know you passion…..whate ever it is I want her to give you a pen too.

    Bostonboomer I want her to appoint you to a special commission with riverdaughter kiki melanie and plukasiak this commission will have oversite on bias reporting in the media. You have been a good watchdog here and keeping me from having to sift through all chaff to get good intel.

    I will dream of my pen signing the science for a cure act thet will focus our vast resources towards curing AIDS breast cancer heart disease and so others….

    I will dream in peace tonight because I know out there Hillary is still working for allof us…

    fuzzybear goodnight

  160. opps Kathy griffin allert no we diod not they replay saturday afternnoon and on sunday -friday too I think

    I need to get Tivo

    fuzzybeargville

  161. dang new thread….

  162. I watch Bravo and I have a feeling it airs at 10 tomorrow.

  163. And now…here’s another satirical play:

    “Obama names Caroline Kennedy Schlossberg and others to lead search for running mate”

    Imagine HRC at the job interview…

    http://www.startribune.com/opinion/commentary/19926959.html?page=1&c=y

  164. Phoenix…..funny!

  165. and funny that Obama, who’s never really held a full time job, would hire someone else who really hasn’t, to come up with a VP candidate.

    do these people realize there’s real work involved here?

    I think they’re all about the glory. and they think the glory comes from tweaking an election. oy. there’s stuff that comes after being elected, believe it or not.

  166. Great job, madamab. Some more thoughts. Instead of pushing Wright off the stage, have a cardboard bus with a chute going under it. Have BO push him down the chute, under the bus. While he is talking, he can be pushing his grandmother ,Plieger, Farrahan, typical white female, and everyone else down the chute.

  167. this is the worst post

  168. Didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. So I did both.

  169. I like Hatsepshut’s play title idea: ObamaMessiah Superstar!

  170. I liked the play. Now I get it. I will vote McCain!!!

  171. For those who wish to stay together in a long term commitment to the ideals and rinciples that Hillary Clinton has spent a lifetime promoting, http://Together4Us.com offers access for activists, funders, students, policy-makers and ordinary people to come together in support of each other and their goals for America. Please come to our website and join, use the code below to put our linked logo on your website and distribute our message and this code to all your network. Spread the word. We will be happy to put up a reciprocal link, your own co-branded web page on our site, or your own blog.

    Thanks so much,
    Gretchen Glasscock,
    Together4Us

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