I challenge Stephen Colbert to a Tolkien Geek Off. I can name all of Galadriel’s names in Quenya, Sindarin and the Common tongue. I know who the Fëanturi are. I know how many Glorfindels are running around Arda. Take that, Stephen! He won’t take me up on it because he knows he doesn’t stand a chance.
Anyway, The Hobbit- An Unexpected Journey starts on Friday and there’s a good chance that I will be at the very first showing. My local theater will show it in 24 fps but I don’t care. I’m going for the story.
And what a story it is, a quest to
burgle win back the Dwarves gold from Smaug the dragon. While I was reading advanced reviews of the movie, I came across this reminder of Tolkien’s thoughts on gold and wealth. The New Yorker reviewer went back to the book to explain the greed of dragons:
It is there in every shimmering scale of Smaug, the dragon; deprived by a mouse-quiet Bilbo of a single precious cup, he falls, Tolkien writes, into “the sort of rage that is only seen when rich folk that have more than they can enjoy suddenly lose something that they have long had but never used or wanted.”
Like tax cuts they didn’t need on top of the insane amount of money that they have already hoarded for themselves and have been sitting on for more than four years. It’s too bad this movie is split into three pieces and we won’t get to The Lonely Mountain until towards the end of the second movie*. Tolkien didn’t like allegories but Smaug the dragon is a timely metaphor. He is the very picture of greed without purpose, sitting on a mountain of gold and keeping all of that capital out of the hands of the people of Middle Earth who could put it to use it to set up their own Inns, mills, vineyards and small biotechs.
I won’t tell you how it ends if you haven’t read the book. Let’s just say that dragons aren’t the only creatures with lust for gold.
One of my favorite quotes about wealth and gold from Tolkien comes in the Fellowship of the Ring when Galadriel asks Gimli the dwarve what he would ask of her as a gift. Dwarves are particularly attracted to shiny objects and the craftsmanship of intricately worked gold and silver. She would have given him whatever he asked for. But he asks for a single strand of her beautiful golden hair. She gives him three and says:
‘These words shall go with the gift,’ she said. `I do not foretell, for all foretelling is now vain: on the one hand lies darkness, and on the other only hope. But if hope should not fail, then I say to you, Gimli son of Glóin, that your hands shall flow with gold, and yet over you gold shall have no dominion.’
Andy Serkis becomes Gollum:
*It has occurred to me that I might die before I see all of the Hobbit films. I could have a house dropped on me or catch some nasty MDR bacteria or my kid could be infected with a zombie virus and will eat my brains some night when I neglect to arm my bedroom door. It could happen. It’s possible that I will never see film three. Peter Jackson should rethink the timing of the movies. Wait. I had this very same irrational fear when the first LOTR movie came out and nothing bad happened. Nevermind.
But I was 12 years younger then…