Once upon a time there was a country that was searching for a new emperor.
The media in this land used giant horns called “viators” that they would blow into to spread the news. These “blow viators” decided that since they were smarter than everyone else they would choose the new emperor.
They picked a young man famous for two things: running races and never wearing clothes. He had won several races only because his opponents had mysteriously tripped and fallen. Everyone called him Butt Naked.
The blow viators spent many months telling everyone how wonderful the young man was, and how terrible his opponents were. They ignored or disputed anything bad that was said about the young man, and made up bad stuff about everyone who opposed or disagreed with him.
Not surprisingly, the young man won. They held a very expensive victory parade so everyone could clap and cheer for the new emperor, and all the wealthy blow viators were puffing on their horns. As usual, the young man wore only his birthday suit.
Now in this land there were some dirty foul-mouthed people who lived on logs in a nearby bog. These “bog loggers” were poor and not too popular but they were outspoken and inordinately proud of their ability to tell the difference between shit and shinola.
Some of the bog loggers watched the parade, and one of them, a young boy named Creek, yelled “The emperor has no clothes!” When people tried to shush the boy he yelled even louder “THE NEW EMPEROR IS BUTT NAKED!”
Everyone stopped in shock. Then Creek’s sister pointed and asked “Is it supposed to be that small?”
The new emperor screamed “SHRINKAGE!” and ran to the castle with both hands covering his stimulus package.
The blow viators whispered among themselves and decided to pretend like nothing had happened, and they continued to tell people how great the new emperor was. The bog loggers ignored the blow viators and kept telling people that the new emperor was Butt Naked.
Eventually most of the people and even some of the blow viators realized that the bog loggers were right (although some of them claimed they had known all along that the new emperor was Butt Naked.) There was one group however (whose brains were severely damaged by the artificial flavorings and colors in a powder they mixed with sugar and water to obtain enlightenment) that forever kept insisting that Butt Naked was really a sharp dressed man.
Then it was time to choose a new emperor, and they did it all over again.
Filed under: General
MyIQ, This is the only circle of sanity around.
I accidentally set my hair appointment for this afternoon. And spent 2 hours TRAPPED in front of a TV showing the so-called festivities.
Thank you VERY much for your enlightening tale.
OMG that is funny.
OT, Sen. Kennedy had a seizure and fell at congressional luncheon before the inaug and is in hospital.
Heh… Heh…
Larry Sinclair sez so.;-)
what do you mean they did it all over again
and where is my fucking pony
and where is my fucking pony
You’ll get your pony at the inaugural BBQ tonight.
I wanna know what happened to the other 3 million people?
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090120/ap_on_go_pr_wh/inauguration_turnout
Thanks for a good laugh on a day when I don’t know whether to laugh, cry or gnash my teeth. Laughing’s better.
My second laugh for the day! Thanks for the wonderful parable, satire, true story. I loved it.
The first laugh came as I heard the TV commentators saying that the most memorable line in the inaugural speech was one about getting ‘knocked down and picking yourself up’– and I was reading that on Closed Caption just as The Confluence popped up on my screen with Hillary’s quote (the original!) and that fabulous picture.
My best moment of the day came when Hillary and Bill walked out at the Capitol and huge crowds of people cheered and waved, and I thought, “We are not alone.”
Carter snubbed Hillary. What a bitter man
http://blogs.abcnews.com/politicalradar/2009/01/carter-snubs-cl.html
i hear bo.s balls are getting canceled..not enough ticket sales.
The spectacle of rich people going to balls while the rest of us freeze our balls off does not inspire me.
But I’m having a ball here. I love the Confluence!
Very nice! I especially liked the “blow viators.”
But wait, why is the little boy named Creek? Am I missing something really obvious?
I believe Obama’s balls have already been canceled. Or rather, they are owned by several banks and corporations, which are holding them trussed. Excuse me, in trust.
OK, I’ll stop now.
Cinie
Interesting article. Did you see the ending?
I love the bog loggers. Bog logger: one who stays afloat in the middle of all the shite, indeed.
i hear bo.s balls are getting canceled
Does michelle know about this?
Perries:
Ask Riverdaughter
Downticket — worse than the Carter snub did you soon the looney-tunes comments? These are the morons who listened to the blow viaters & who voted for Bush and Obama in case anyone was wondering.
Also, expect a big discount on memorabilia
http://edgeoforever.wordpress.com/2009/01/20/get-your-memorabilia-on-sale/
frenly(elderj)
For longer than you think. Remember when she went on The View and called him “pathetic”?
Edge, I was wondering how many people were wearing their Obama panties and shorts today. Do they come in pea green lace?
Frenly, perhaps we should remind Michelle of her own quote: “If a women can’t take care of her own house . . .”
and so it begins …
With a wave of a hand and a smile President Obama will dismantle this country’s social safety nets, Social Security and Medicare all in the name of bipartisanship. I know Liberals would never agree to this but will the Progressives that make up Obamanation make excuses and support him? They have made excuses for him so far regarding FISA, NAFTA, ending the war, keeping Bush tax cuts, keeping Gates, Warren and whole host of Republican talking points. Or is Progressive now really Republican Lite?
Help! I am in moderation. Please let me out of prison.
If you have questions about the inaugural balls go here
I have bigger things in mind!
The Carter snub was pathetic.
O.T. Is Kennedy okay? I haven’t watched a bit of it on teevee, but rather I’m watching my fave drug-loving doc, House.
Help I’m in moderation!
You’ll get your pony at the inaugural BBQ tonight.
_______________________________________
I’d like a leg please.
The economy sucks and I can throw that in the freezer.
angienc2 – I didn’t.
Am I the only one who thought Kennedy faked when they read about his collapse? Maybe I have become too cynical but that is what I thought. Now Paterson will have to choose CK as Hillary’s replacement.
I hope Kennedy is okay. I would like him to leave long enough to see the damage he did.
downticket
no-you are not the only one-but you said it first!
Downticket, cat,save a place for me next to y’all on the Hell Express — my thoughts exactly (except I don’t give a d@mn if he is ok)
catarina – thanks. It is a bad thing to think of someone so ill but this is a crazy world and it seems some people will do anything to get what they want.
hey every one how is it going it was total Obamaporn at work today!
I really felt like I was gonna puke!
oh, what the hell angie
might as well be honest
Teddie’s been gone a few months, like BO’s granny.
But it’s all in the timing-and a big inaugural drama would mean
CK gets the senate seat.
So they stage this, with a Teddy look-alike.
This is the tin foil room, right??
“You’ll get your pony at the inaugural BBQ tonight.”
*snort*
spammy got me again
i must have said another bad word.
fuzzy — we got snow here so I had a snow day, slept in & watched House!
This is teh funny:
I’ll let you guess who the quote is referring to.
catarina:
Spammy’s got a thing for you today.
Jay-sus! I really shouldn’t have gone & read a story about what happened to Ted today — when he feel to the floor Obama (at another table) reportedly said:
“Looks like somebody’s down.”
WTF kind of response is that?
Have I mentioned how much I loathe that empty-headed, empty suit?
myiq — too easy — we all know Michelle has a penchant for sofas-slip-covers-as-dresses.
Where was that quote from?
You know how you read something weird, but kinda cool and funny at the same time, and just have to share? I don’t know anything at all about this blogger, just followed a link from BuzzTracker, but it tickled me.
http://thebloggess.com/?p=1223
angienc said: Have I mentioned how much I loathe that empty-headed, empty suit?
So tell us how you really feel angie
angie!
“duuuhhhhhh-looks like somebody’s down.”
come on
theres the proof that it was staged!
myiq
it’s this peach color I’m wearing-makes me irresistable.
myiq – I just came from that entry over on ace, a site I had not previously read. rofl!
If the Pampers memoralbilia goes on sale will the big “O” obama phalis also be on sale….I guess they did not fly off the shelf.
On the lighter side:
There is so much oil awash in the world today there is no place to keep it storage facilities are bursting at the seems…
Now the only place to store it is in excess tanker capacity so floating around at sea on collective voyages to nowhere….is about 80 million barrels of oil enough to supply the whole world for 1 day…
The inventory of the black sticky stuff keeps building, even with the 2 million barrel cut by OPEC that goes into effect on Feb 1, 2009 it may take months to draw down this huge reserve of stored oil.
Make fun of MO until midnight tonight
after that it will appear on your karmic credit card at the normal rates
Catrina is Peach the new blue?
We don’t need the people, just their checks
http://wcbstv.com/politics/barack.obama.inauguration.2.913349.html
More from the Ace-holes:
I, of course, totally disapprove of the above comments.
Cinie, on January 20th, 2009 at 6:08 pm Said:
You know how you read something weird, but kinda cool and funny at the same time, and just have to share? I don’t know anything at all about this blogger, just followed a link from BuzzTracker, but it tickled me.
http://thebloggess.com/?p=1223
_________
She’s hilarious. Thanks, I needed that.
go for it, myiq.
today it’s therapeutic and anyway fuck em if they can’t take a joke.
Still on the lighter (low fat) side:
A new round of job layoffs is expected in the resource mining industry as “mountians” of unneeeded Iron Ore, Coal, Copper, Zinc and other strategic metal ores back up in the refining pipline.
One half of all mining jobs could be lost in the next nine month….
Oh and Obama-post industrial America? WTF…we need to rebuild our industries along with our infastructure. what a $hit head…..
Myiq2xu-Angie is it treasonous to call the Pampers in chief an A$$hat?
angienc2, on January 20th, 2009 at 6:07 pm Said:
Jay-sus! I really shouldn’t have gone & read a story about what happened to Ted today — when he feel to the floor Obama (at another table) reportedly said:
“Looks like somebody’s down.”
WTF kind of response is that?
Have I mentioned how much I loathe that empty-headed, empty suit?
********
ditto,ditto,ditto. Remember when someone passed out at one of Hillary’s campaign speeches? She grabbed a glass of water and went right into the crowd to the person. No hesitation, no thoughts of her own safety–just pure, appropriate concern and action.
Our nation has been denied, and deprived.
myiq — LMAO — I just went over there & read them myself — I TOTALLY disapprove of them too.
OT
I need a little help here. I am going to a town council meeting tonight. They want to put up a cell phone tower less than 1000 ft from my house.
I am reading about radio frequency radiation from these things.
I do not understand all of it and there are so many people here with expertise in so many things I thought someone could tell me what questions should be asked at the meeting.
Thank You
WOMEN WITH INTELLIGENCE AND EXPERIENCE, MEN WHO SUPPORT THEM AND COUNTRY BEFORE PARTY ALWAYS
PUMAS,BUBBAS AND THOSE PEOPLE RULE
better laugh now, kids
the Klingon Battle Dress will be on the cover of every mag for the next month.
Fuzzy:
The legal term is “seditious libel”
That’s what John Peter Zenger was charged with, but he was acquitted because truth is a defense.
Chewbacca just called. He wants his wife’s housecoat back.
Oh my.
Well I have steak nite with the Obats….but politics and Obma Porn are going to be verboten topics tonight I am in no mood!
ZOMG!
thanks helen, I forgot what tonight is!
I have to go get my post ready
please don’t forget about me tonight!
Helenk dont let them do it cell towers are eye sores and they are bad for the enviroment birds get killed by the microwaves if they land on the suckers-
human dangers not withstanding the amount of resources that go into these “towers” is insane also the companies that hang their switches and recievers on these things increase traffic and noise around the tower.
Hellen Fight the placement of that tower like you would fight an obat puting a bumper sticker on your car.
my Karma credit card is overdrawn now.
taggles are you on air tonight? when….
angienc
shades of “that’s one bad plot”
helen — sorry, I can’t help with that — my default position is to believe the worst but I don’t want to scare you based on nothing. Anyone else here know about engineering/radiation?
I meant “pilot” – W on 9.11
Thanks myiq2xu: This is a very bad day and this post is the first laugh I have had all day. I am so sick of downer inauguration days. I have eaten one entire cake and had three mochas today. My guts are killing me. Thanks for the laugh. I am impressed with your IQ today.
Ok — I’ve got to go get some work done. No snow day tomorrow.
helen
im with fuzzy-fight the tower if you can.
RF exposure has been tied to increased risk of some types of cancer in Great Britain
I’m no expert but I think it’s especially dangerous if pregnant or planning to be.
helen
spammy got me again!
In Great Britain RF exposure has been linked to increased risk of some types of cancer.
I’m no expert on this subject, but I’ve heard the exposure can be dangerous if pregnant or planning to be.
everyone has to call Taggles tonight and wish her a
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! woohooo!!
helenk, on January 20th, 2009 at 6:24 pm Said:
OT
I need a little help here. I am going to a town council meeting tonight. They want to put up a cell phone tower less than 1000 ft from my house.
*************
http://www.cancer.org/docroot/PED/content/PED_1_3X_Cellular_Phone_Towers.asp?sitearea=WHO
“I hope Kennedy is okay. I would like him to leave long enough to see the damage he did.”
You can’t see the damage from Martha’s Vineyard. From up there we all look like ants.
Thank you all
The more I read the more I could not understand why they did not put where there were no houses. There is a lot of open space in Hemet and this did not make sense to me.
I live in an over 55 years community. But just because I am over 55 (but in my mind I am only 21} does not mean I am expendable even though backtrack and gang think I am.
How odd that Byrd and Kennedy did not get to enjoy the fruits of their labor today after stabbing Senator Clinton in the back to get this fraud here today.
WOMEN WITH INTELLIGENCE AND EXPERIENCE, MEN WHO SUPPORT THEM AND COUNTRY BEFORE PARTY ALWAYS
PUMAS,BUBBAS, AND THOSE PEOPLE RULE
ok for those who’s Karma card is overdrawn…
earn 100,000 Kharma points…..just make a small donation to:
Pumapac.org
HeidiLi’s 51%
or any pumasphere supported charity
DYB,
Kennedy goes to Hyannisport, not the Vineyard.
My Buddhist minister friend sent me an invitation to celebrate with his group this weekend the “Glorious transition our country is undergoing.”
“Looks like somebody’s down.”
Perfect. Obama sitting motionless and stating the obvious while a collapse takes place.
Is it me, or do I sense a quote, nay a trope, for the next four years?
Obama on Universal Health Care:
“Looks like somebody’s down.”
On people struggling without social safety nets.
On people losing their homes while the banks get bloody transfusions.
On failing to understand why Reagan’s trickle-down economics don’t work.
“Gosh. Look like somebody’s down.”
Obama 2012: Sittin’ here cuz you put me here, mates.
“God don’t like ugly.”
If that’s true why did s/he make so much of it?
I never blame God for the creation of ugly…
helen did you see my post about cell towers?
I work for a company that owns lots of cell towers they ruin your porperty values.
I am a little expert on forcing cell towers on people who dont want them….
of course when they tride to site them in my neighborhood-I went NIMBY on them!
you are my friend so I am helping you out
“DYB,
Kennedy goes to Hyannisport, not the Vineyard.”
That’s even further, isn’t it?
We made chicken soup for dinner. Talk about “Chicken Soup for the Soul” — there’s nothing like the actual thing. I almost feel better.
I dreamt last night that the world was coming to an end and I was being herded into a big fiery crack in the earth’s surface…
The market tumble is a sure sigh of wallstreet R@cism!
From this day forward Reality based investing is R@cist!
that is what I expect to hear from the obots tonight wish me luck!
ok all off to dinner tonight its cold here too down to 25F tonight….no snow but expect ice
TFHT thread is up!
big fiery crack
There is a treatment for that.
DYB,
No, it isn’t further.
For those of you who were looking forward to the Ludakris ball, it has been cancelled. Also Diane Warwick’s ball, and “tons” of other “urban” balls.
http://www.rapbasement.com/ludacris/012009-many-urban-balls-in-washington-dc-were-cancelled-after-low-selling-ticket-sales.html
Maybe they could have let people in free? No, I guess not.
Thank the beneficent spirits for the Confluence. I am among sane people again. Whew!
I worked today, thinking since it’s a clinic, I’d be safe from Bamaporn and Odroids. No such effing luck. My office mate is watching the Coronation on her computer with the sound ON. I joke I need to get my earplugs, and that I can’t see spending $170-180 million when we have patients losing their jobs and w/out insurance. “Oh, but the taxpayers aren’t paying for it,” followed by “it’s a new and better change,” and “he’s unified the country” and “well he’s president now.” I almost puked over her desk. As we know, logic doesn’t work with Kool-aid addicts, so all my facts were ignored.
But she was nice enough to switch to using her earplugs so I didn’t have audible drivel forced on me. I was able to peek at comments here every so often thru the day.
Great story, myiq; I needed some PUMA humor bad.
BB — you read RapBasement much?