Funny Thanksgiving Stories Open Thread

Well, I saw a wild turkey in Central Park today.

What the?

What the?

And you?

About these ads

171 Responses

  1. Interesting creatures, aren’t they? MMMM – tasty too! :)

  2. http://abclocal.go.com/kgo/story?section=news/local/north_bay&id=6515974

    Dollar store employee’s family denied death benefits

  3. I lost my little kid gravatar again – it seems to come and go at will?!?!?

  4. For any one who is bored today, there’s always dailypuma.

  5. Me – Yeesh!

  6. You were right madamaB–s/he is beautiful. I retract my previous comment re: turkey attractiveness.

    I think everyone is on the road. I wanted to talk to Angienc about her diabetic cat but she is m.i.a.

  7. Very nice wild turkey pic! I am impressed that they can be found in central park.

    That reminds me I need to go pick up our turkey from Whole Foods. Unlike those earthy Alaskans, a whole foods turkey is gently talked to death by a team of corporate lawyers, accompanied by flute and harp. So humane.

  8. reposted from the last thread:

    So what I want to know is, who is Darth Rahm’s sith master?

    There are always two….

  9. Micki – The National Turkey Anti-Defamation League thanks you.
    ;-)

    Yup, angienc is MIA for me too. Only a few of us are around…I was supposed to be on the road, but it turned out we had to stay here in NYC.

  10. I have an anecdote. My husband went to the gun store today. He visited there before some years ago and normally the place is stocked to the teeth like an arsenal.

    Today it was absolutely empty. Nothing.

    The staff said he would have to order direct from the manufacturer.

    Apparently they are not exaggerating about this gun purchase spike.

  11. You know a pretty bird–the pheasant. I remember when I was growing up, we had one at Christmas that my grandpop shot. It was so beautiful. They, my grammy floss cooked it up for dinner.

  12. perries – LOLOLOLOL!

    You know who’d be great at talking a turkey to death? Joe Biden.

    As for Rahm-Bo, it might be his dad. He is quite the shadowy figure.

  13. Well, I have to work till 7 and then go home to do prep work for my dishes for tomorrow. My parents only live 45 mins from here and dinner isn’t until 3. I have to get there at 1, though, to supervise my brother’s turkey frying escapades.

    perries: I don’t know much about Star Wars except that Hayden Christiansen canNOT act and the latest three were horrible. Blech. Patoey!

  14. I am cooking the whole dinner myself for my hubby tomorrow, but only because he is working. He is supposed to bake corn muffins today, but I don’t know if he’ll have the time!

  15. I am making sweet potato gratin, cauliflower cheese (with three cheeses YUM), green beans almondine and a huge dutch oven filled with apple crisp made with five different varieties of apples. I don’t have any turkey so I have to make sure the sides are good, so I make them myself. My mom really can’t cook but we are too nice to tell her. We just let her cook the bird. My brother is going to fry it though, so I think my mom is in charge of rolls and gravy!!! :)

  16. I walk out back, through the woods and into the apple orchard and I can guarantee I’ll see a flock of turkeys tomorrow. That is if I make it through the woods without being shot for looking like a deer.

    Our neighborhood turkeys follow the leader across roads and always wait for traffic to clear.

    Have a great Holiday Madam.

    NH

  17. Micki – My mom couldn’t cook either, but she knew it. She was a good baker, though – made great zucchini bread, banana bread and fun birthday cakes for me.

    Luckily I take after my dad in terms of cooking ability.
    ;-)

  18. Micki, on November 26th, 2008 at 4:38 pm Said:
    I am making sweet potato gratin, cauliflower cheese (with three cheeses YUM), green beans almondine and a huge dutch oven filled with apple crisp made with five different varieties of apples.
    _________

    D*mn, can I come over your house? I’ll be sure to bring a pair of pants with an elastic waist band.

  19. Thanks, NH – You too!

    There are not supposed to be turkeys in Central Park, by the way. This one was wandering around completely lost. I think it’s been there since the summer, since a friend of mine wrote me that she saw it around that time.

  20. I have a funny turkey story and what’s more it true. It’s much to long to post here but if you want to read it, it’s at http://insightanalytical.wordpress.com/.

  21. Ah yes, the flute serenade at Whole Foods turkey slaugh— ooops. Wasn’t supposed to say that. Actually, I think that being talked to death by corporate lawyers sounds the opposite of humane!

    I’m vegetarian so I like to poke fun at some of my squeamish omnivore friends now and then. But only the Obot ones.

    I have no problem with realistic omnivores and PUMAs, I hasten to say.

  22. I learned from my Nanny. I basically lived with her b/c my mom got divorced when I was 18 months old. When she got remarried, I wanted to be at my Nanny’s house all the time. My nanny was a kick ass cook. She taught me everything. How to cook, how to sew, how to quilt, how to fix things around the house. She had a tool box in the basement. She was awesome. I miss her.

  23. Joanelle, on November 26th, 2008 at 4:26 pm Said:
    I lost my little kid gravatar again – it seems to come and go at will?!?!?

    I know what you mean Joanelle. Sometimes I’m Susan B. Anthony and sometimes I’m a deranged looking upside down green heart. Disconcerting to say the least.

  24. Micki – I’m coming to eat your apple crisp – yummy!

    I agree those most recent 3 Star Wars were just awful. As me and my husband like to say “Oh Anakin, you massacred a village. Far from considering this a red flag in our relationship, I am now wholly committed to you.” Also – interstellar travel, but Anakin can’t call or write his mom for years? Eh? What’s up with that? But it’s easy to make fun of. And now that we know Lucas is an Obot and therefore feebleminded – it all becomes more clear.

  25. It seems that a lost turkey in Central Park would be a meal already. It must be from the zoo. Turkeys are never alone except when mating, always in a group.

    hmmm I could be bad with that last line but I won’t.

  26. OMG, Kenosha, that is AWESOME!!!

    I especially love the ending.

  27. madamab in the new administration it will be Biden’s special privilege to talk the White House turkey to death every year. You are so right – he’s a natural choice. Brilliant!

    Well the team of corporate lawyers take the turkey through repeated revisions of a complicated draft agreement with lots of license back provisions, stopping repeatedly to debate the placement and necessity for every ‘the’ or ‘an’ or ‘that’ or ‘which.’ It’s enough to destroy any being’s will to live. If a kill cone was available the turkey would probably fling itself in.

    okay got to go before everybody gets home and discovers me lounging. Have a great thanksgiving everybody!

  28. Micki – My grandma was great, too, but she was a Hollywood wife. Not much cooking going on there.

    NH – I can’t imagine what would eat that turkey. All the other animals are far too small to pose any threat – the raccoons would run away from it!

    Perries – An Obot, eh? Well, that explains Jar-Jar Binks.

  29. yes at some point I read Lucas quoted as saying Obama was definitely a Jedi.

    Yeah it must have been all those years of tireless and dedicated training.

    okay really got to go – happy eating!

  30. I have a funny story about my nephew who is almost 6.

    He was asked to be the ring bearer in a family wedding that is happening this weekend. He said he didn’t want to do it, and we have been trying to encourage him to change his mind.

    After a couple of days, he asked his mom “Will there be some kind of practice for this?

    She said, “Yes, you will all rehearse the day before.”

    So my nephew said, “Is that when I put on the bear suit?”

    No wonder he didn’t want to do it!

  31. Kenosamarge: that story was tremendous.

    Perries: “Oh Anakin, you massacred a village. Far from considering this a red flag in our relationship, I am now wholly committed to you.”

    OH. MY. GOD. I am laughing hysterically. “I’ve died a little every day. . . ” Blah blah blah

  32. I’m just listening to the terrorist news story form Mumbai on the Neil Cavutto program. It’s terrible – of course it is; all terrorist attacks are totally appalling. Yet there is a bigger picture that these sensational stories distract us from – the hidden, almost silent, evidence of thousands of unwarranted deaths that do not appear on Fox News or on CNN. They are the thousands of people who die of stress from their housing problems – suicides and heart attacks; the thousands who die similarly from financial loss and struggle to retire with dignity. The media rides the wave of the tiny, but sensational. It’s how the media is. But it’s not how life is: the world is not dying because of terrorist attacks, by and large. But possibly hundreds of thousands of people are dying world wide because of financial stress and lack of food, brought on by rapidly rising prices.

    What’s this got to do with Obama and Hillary? Well, from from my perspective, Obama lives in the sensational but inconsequential world. Hillary lives in the real world. As such, she was, and is, of little interest to a sensationalist, but trivial, media.

  33. madamaB–my mom was a hippie, which sort of explains why my nanny’s skills did not rub off on her. My mom actually got a sewing machine once. I don’t know what she thought she was going to do with it, but it basically held laundry. I started using it and I didn’t like it, so I got a newer, better one for Christmas one year. My mom does needlepoint and such. She does mean counted cross stitch. She is high strung, so I think it calms her nerves. She knits and crochets, too.

  34. bb-no way
    the poor kid!

    Kenosha
    great story, really enjoyed it

  35. Kenoshamarge,

    I laughed out loud this morning when you posted a comment asking where your Susan B. Anthony pic went and then it was there. Your next comment said, “never mind.”

  36. UTC – You may just be onto something there. After all, Obama has laid out a detailed plan for fixing the college football playoff system, but no one knows yet how he is going to fix the economy.

  37. BB – LOL! That is too cute.

  38. Hey madamab, when I was talking about inconsequential I didn’t have in mind College Football. Now THAT’S important! Damn, this guy is good, isn’t he?

  39. I’m off to bake pears and start my holiday media blackout.

    For the next few days I’m going to hang out and eat turkey and potatoes and stuff. I don’t give a rats ass what Obama does.

    *hurls turkey wing at micki*

  40. “In an early look at the 2010 U.S. Senate race, Republican incumbent Sen. Arlen Specter leads TV commentator Chris Matthews, a possible Democratic challenger, 45-33 percent. Sen. Specter leads 72-9 percent among Republicans and 45-27 percent among independent voters, while Matthews leads 55-25 percent among Democrats.”

    http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/08331/930930-100.stm

    The only reason that I’d like to see Chris Mathews run for the Senate it go get him off of TV.

  41. That would be – “IS to get him off of TV”

  42. Micki – My mom was a beatnik – in other words, a hippie who wore black and smoked Gauloises in cafes. She did know how to sew, though. I can barely do a button by hand, and have no idea how to use a machine.
    ;-)

  43. Good for you, catarina! I’ll be too busy cooking tomorrow to worry about Obama.

    BTW – as President-elect, will he pardon himself tomorrow?
    ;-)

  44. madamab,

    It reminded me of Calvin in Calvin and Hobbes.

  45. eat, drink, and be merry, madamab!
    have a good one.

  46. Catrina–what is it with you and poultry hurling (wipes turkey gravy off of face)!!! :P

  47. Happy Thanksgiving, Catarina! I don’t give rat’s ass what Obama does either.

  48. Maybe as co-president, Obama will insist on being the one to pardon the Turkey at the WH.

  49. madamaB: did she live in San Francisco? I like San Francisco. It is my favorite U.S. city. London is my favorite all time city that I’ve visited, though.

    I avoid all things Obama.

  50. BB – awww…that’s so cute!

    Funny Thanksgiving story: I was going to meet my future mother-in-law (although I didn’t know it) for the first time. Future hubby and I were going to Maryland for my first Thanksgiving with the family. I asked him what his mother was like, and he said “You know the comic strip ‘Momma’? She’s a lot like that.”

    Catarina – you too!

  51. I’ve made the pumpkin soup, I’ve got the shrimp ready to go, and made the lime-based dipping sauce (lime relish, apple cider vinegar and a dash of Ketjap Manis), I’ve got two cranberry relishes in the freezer, a baguette coated with butter garlic and basil, a casserole dish of sweet potatoes with butter, brown sugar and maple syrup, and a dish of root vegetables, with rosemary, garlic, olive oil, pepper, basil, just sweating overnight before their sojourn into the oven. The turkey is marinading in finger liking sauce, BBQ sauce, molasses, thyme, sage, basil, garlic and lemon. Lookin’ good! The wine is in the fridge, as is the champagne. I’ve had a beer of three, and I think we’re about set. Still gravy and pecan pie to make, but – in theory, – that’s a doddle.

    Happy thanksgiving to one and all.

  52. Micki – she DID live in San Francisco!!! LOLOLOLOL

    She met my dad while she was in one of those cafes, looking glamorous. Dad was part of the entertainment, playing the flute in a jazz combo. He says she was the coolest chick he had ever seen.

    My brother still lives in SF. He’s an Obot, but I love him anyway.

  53. Glad you folks liked my story. Remembering my 6’4″ 250 lb. spouse thinking he was hiding from a turkey by crouching behind a little bush is a memory that makes me laugh out loud to this day.

    I needed to remember that story and I needed to re-connect with my family and I needed to refuse to let Obama and the frakkin Obots ruin my family’s holiday.

    We have warned the ObotGranddaughter and her tedious boyfriend that if they say one word to ruin our holiday they will both be drizzled with honey and buried in an ant hill. Or tied to the couch and forced to watch reruns of Leave it to Beaver until they learn how to behave in polite society. (Our family, polite society, now that’s a funny holiday story.)

  54. (quickly driving to UTC’s house)

  55. Here’s some Cow Comedy from Pumapac comments:
    SOCIALISM
    You have 2 cows.
    The State takes one and gives it to someone else.

    COMMUNISM
    You have 2 cows.
    The State takes both and gives you some milk.

    FASCISM
    You have 2 cows.
    The State takes both and sells you some milk.

    NAZISM
    You have 2 cows.
    The State takes both and shoots you.

    BUREAUCRATISM
    You have 2 cows.
    The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the
    milk away…

    TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM
    You have two cows.
    You sell one and buy a bull.
    Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
    You sell them and retire on the income.

    SURREALISM
    You have two giraffes.
    The government requires you to take harmonica lessons

    and more at :

    http://pumapac.org/2008/11/25/happy-song-3/#comment-247593

  56. Oh, I forgot about the baked brie with filo pastry, cranberries and roasted garlic. That’s a job for tomorrow.

  57. Kenosha – may the spirit of Obama never descend upon your happy home at Thanksgiving.

    (makes various Obama-warding gestures)

  58. madamab: that is very cool. I am visualizing berets being involved, too.

    Tell your brother to have a coffee from Cafe Trieste for me. We order the coffee online now, but its not the same. My husband was stationed at Alameda when he was in the Navy Sea College program. He was in the Navy for 2 years and got buckets of money for college AND he didn’t spend any of his money from the Navy. So, he got to live in San. Francisco for five years going to San Francisco State for 200 bucks a semester and spending all of his Navy money. He still pines.

  59. madamab – make the sign of PUMA. That should keep the little f@$&*er away!

  60. I’m gonna get a bottle of Wild Turkey for my Thanksgiving dinner.

    I’m gonna skip the stuffing and mash taters.

    Maybe I’ll have some beer for dessert.

  61. kenoshamarge, I like the “tedious boyfriend” image. :)

  62. (knocking on UTC’s door)

    bluemorning – thanks for the link!

    Here’s my favorite:

    AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
    Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow has dropped dead.

    :-)

  63. sorry, micki-I really need to cut down the caffeine.

    wtf urge
    I haven’t even started, drinking or cooking!

    Making cod with fennel and tomatoes for dinner-time to get moving.

  64. Micki – The beret would have worked very well, had it not been for my mother’s Amy Winehouse beehive. (I have a picture.)

    My father may have been sporting one, although I’m not sure if he was quite that hep.
    ;-)

  65. What I’m thankful for this Thanksgiving is my family, their health, and you guys. Thanks a bunch for just being here.

  66. myiq
    that is NOT very nutritious!

    utc someone really ought to smack you
    madamab, lets crash that party, shall we? I think he’s in MA if I’m not mistaken..

  67. You too, UTC!

    {{{Group Hug}}}

  68. awww..
    {{{grouphugback}}}

  69. I want some of UTC’s baked brie. I may stop and get brie and bread on the way home. I’m not going to have any time to cook dinner tonight, anyway.

  70. Catarina just threw some more turkey parts at me while you guys were hugging. :P

  71. you crazy micki
    did no such thing :razz:

    should i prop my life-sized johnny mac cutout at the dinner table tomorrow for old time’s sake?

  72. Catarina: Its imperative!!

  73. Goldarn it! Gosh and golly! Yes, you SHOULD cat! And what Micki said: It’s something you should neither avoided nor evade, no how!

  74. allrighty then
    I’ll haul ole johnny out of the basement
    he’ll be the guest of honor

  75. My daughter is boarding a plane in Boston right now. College freshman. She will be in Baltimore around 7pm. Just finished making the crab cakes and salad. The fettuccine is ready to put together at the last minute. I can worry about tomorrow, tomorrow . Tonight it is about Maryland food.

  76. Urgetocompute,

    Can you drop me off a plate of samples from your dinner? Sounds so good!

  77. Have fun, Honora!

  78. Ah yes, honora – my fellow Baltimoron!!!

    Mmmmm, crab cakes….

    A couple of times, my family and I had turkey tettrazini at Thanksgiving. There were only four of us, and my dad made a mean tettrazini.
    :-)

  79. bostonboomer, you can’t know how much I would like to have you over for Thanksgiving dinner. You are one person – there are many others – who will be in my thoughts (as I gobble down the food and guzzle the wine!)

  80. The past few years I have developed that habit of staying home on holidays.

    No crowds, no drunk drivers, no DUI checkpoints, no life

  81. Just popping in to say happy Thanksgiving. Now, back in the kitchen!

  82. and can I just say (and then I’ll really get off my ass and cook) that it really SUCKED having to vote for McCain/Palin??

    I have been holding this in for WEEKS.

    Didn’t want to vent here and be negative and possibly influence anyone who was considering voting against Obama, so I just STFU.

    But now that it’s over I have to let it out -I hate John McCain-bleck!!!! Always did bleeeeeccccckkkkkk!!!!!!

    And I stuck up for Sarah. I respect her.
    But ohhhhman!
    I didn’t want to vote for them and I had no choice and it really, really sucked. end.
    thanks for listening, please send me a bill.

  83. I’ve been gone all day so I hit all my favorite blogs to see what I missed.

    I missed nada planada.

    The blogosphere is a virtual ghost town today.

  84. honora, on November 26th, 2008 at 5:46 pm Said:
    Tonight it is about Maryland food.
    *************
    Fried oysters and St. Mary’s County stuffed ham…

  85. Happy Thanksgiving EOF!

    catarina – Can’t blame you. I was looking forward to having a Democratic President SO MUCH, and to voting for ANY Democrat. I had so much hope and belief that things would change. Now, I feel like everything is going to get a lot worse.

    The worst part was that we could have had someone who I would have been SO EXCITED to vote for.

  86. myiq – Yup. It’s been very quiet here too.

    It’s all about the meatspace today.
    ;-)

  87. I like Fels Point. Its very groovy. Maryland is cool. I like the Eastern Shore, too. When I was growing up, we always went camping at Elk Neck State Park. We boated in the Chesapeake. Sigh.

  88. SHV- I’m from Brooklyn, so all I can do are the crab cakes. I even believe that sauerkraut is for Nathan’s frankfurters and not turkey dinner. Heresy in the Free State.

  89. Micki – Yay, Maryland. I love my home state!

  90. I wanted to vote for HRC, obviously. Everyone was walking around talking about how historic the election was and blah blah blah and all I could think of was how much I wanted a different historic moment, a moment that would actually be truly and undeniably meaningful for ME. Plus, BO’s a big fat cheater.

  91. mad
    I wanted the smart president!
    I think McCain would have done ok, but I was ready to be led and inspired *sob*

  92. tonight is all about cooking with my daughter in preparation for tomorrow — one of my favorite traditions!

    This year I’m armed with some Pomegranate Liquer and champagne — yum! and (hic)

  93. Madamab: I almost moved to Annapolis. The hubby works for the guv’ment and he commuted from Annapolis to College Park. He moved to Phila instead for ME! YAY!!! I win!! But anyway, I love Annapolis, too. I would have moved down there if I had taken the MD bar. I didn’t want to be a DC lawyer.

  94. i want some of SOD’s vegan fare for dinner, actually. I change my order.

  95. thank you for reminding me sod, must chill prosecco..
    mmm pomegranate liquor-that sounds good. Make a Persephonosa!

  96. The only thing I was excited about with McCain was the fact that he promised gender equity in his Cabinet and that he would make sure that the number of women in government significantly increased during his term in office. And I really liked Sarah Palin.

    The weird thing is, I wonder if the economic appointments would have been any different with McCain. I’m sure the Chicago cronies like Goolsbee wouldn’t have made it in, but wouldn’t his peeps be center-right as well?

    We really were handed a choice that wasn’t this time. It SUCKED.

  97. what are you making, SOD

  98. Hi SOD! Mmmmm, yummy!

  99. Madamab- Do you ever go and see the parade, of is that just for tourists. Growing up, my uncle would take us from Brooklyn and it remains such a wonderful memory. I always wanted to take my kids, but never did (Remember one in college!!)

  100. Maybe I’m a sucker but I believe there would have been some reform with Mac/Palin.
    I think there would have been more overall transparency.
    Obama’s team is secretive. It’s creepy.

  101. Honora – You know, I never go see that parade. LOL! Just like the Times Square thing on New Year’s Eve, we Noo Yawkuz let the tourists go for the most part. At least, those of us without kids usually stay home and watch it on the TeeVee.

  102. Not the funniest turkey story, but cute nonetheless.

    About 15 years ago, before we moved, my daughter (only 5 at the time) and I were in the kitchen Thanksgiving morning starting the day’s traditions when we looked out the window and saw 2 turkeys crossing the street and coming towards our house. Now mind you, we lived much closer the city at the time – not quite your turkey-friendly area. But here were these 2 turkeys, crossing the street heading straight for our yard. The funniest part is they were looking at each other making turkey noises as if they were oblivious to the rest of the world chatting to each other on their leisurely walk through the neighborhood.

    When they crossed the street, I was certain they would continue back into the safety of our back yard…but they didn’t. They turned left and headed straight up the sidewalk. These two silly birds strolled up the sidewalk for 2 blocks until they turned and went out of sight. neighbors on the block were out on their porches, watching in amazement, as were we, at the two chatty birds out for a leisurely walk on a Thanksgiving morning.

  103. catarina – I think there would have been more reform, but the economy would have had to take a front seat.

  104. DANG ! my turkey story went into moderation! no “V” “R” or “P” words in it!

    Help!

  105. Here’s our Vegan Thanksgiving menu!

    Tofurky cooked in a bag (sorta like Joseph’s idea)
    Sourdough stuffing – my daughter makes this and it’s awesome!
    vegan irish mashed potatoes
    veggie gravy
    sweet potatoes
    homemade cranberry sauce
    some kind of veggies – probably broccoli
    and Tofu Pumpkin pie — better than regular! seriously!

  106. madamab, release SOD. I need entertained.

  107. Thanks!

  108. BTW — I stole angienc’s cranberry sauce recipe from the other night. It has port wine in it and I can’t wait to try it!

  109. Poop, I can’t release her. I don’t have enough admin rights on this blog. Sorry SOD, I don’t know what Spammy’s problem is!
    :evil:

    Must go – company coming. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

  110. What I’m seeing so far from Obama leads me to believe he’s gonna the new and improved Bush Administation – 2% less corrupt, 2% more efficient.

    Wee!

  111. Happy Thanksgiving Madamab!!!

  112. SOD: that looked good. I’m not in charge of cranberries this year, but I may try for Christmas.

  113. I’ll Try again…

    Not the funniest turkey story, but cute nonetheless.
    About 15 years ago, before we moved, my daughter (only 5 at the time) and I were in the kitchen Thanksgiving morning starting the day’s traditions when we looked out the window and saw 2 turkeys crossing the street and coming towards our house. Now mind you, we lived much closer the city at the time – not quite your turkey-friendly area. But here were these 2 turkeys, crossing the street heading straight for our yard. The funniest part is they were looking at each other making turkey noises as if they were oblivious to the rest of the world chatting to each other on their leisurely walk through the neighborhood.

    When they crossed the street, I was certain they would continue back into the safety of our back yard…but they didn’t. They turned left and headed straight up the sidewalk. These two silly birds strolled up the sidewalk for 2 blocks until they turned and went out of sight. neighbors on the block were out on their porches, watching in amazement, as were we, at the two chatty birds out for a leisurely walk on a Thanksgiving morning.

  114. I tried posting my turkey story again but it still doesn’t work — for the life of me I can’t figure what’s triggering the moderation

  115. I need a drink. I think the clock is moving backwards.

  116. try it in parts.

  117. That might be awful micki — one part might not show up!

  118. part 1

    Not the funniest turkey story, but cute nonetheless.
    About 15 years ago, before we moved, my daughter (only 5 at the time) and I were in the kitchen Thanksgiving morning starting the day’s traditions when we looked out the window and saw 2 turkeys crossing the street and coming towards our house. Now mind you, we lived much closer the city at the time – not quite your turkey-friendly area. But here were these 2 turkeys, crossing the street heading straight for our yard. The funniest part is they were looking at each other making turkey noises as if they were oblivious to the rest of the world chatting to each other on their leisurely walk through the neighborhood.

  119. part 2

    When they crossed the street, I was certain they would continue back into the safety of our back yard…but they didn’t. They turned left and headed straight up the sidewalk. These two silly birds strolled up the sidewalk for 2 blocks until they turned and went out of sight. neighbors on the block were out on their porches, watching in amazement, as were we, at the two chatty birds out for a leisurely walk on a Thanksgiving morning.

  120. part 2 won’t post…hmmm

  121. I stole Angie’s shrimp recipe. I’m not sure when I will use it, but believe me the shrimps heads will not be on.. (Yes, I know the flavor and all that, but shrimp heads, please….)

  122. Honora: the only thing with eyes that I eat are potatoes. I don’t like my food looking at me. did you see shark tale?

    SOD I want the story!!!

  123. micki — I am stumped! I wouldn’t know what to change to stop the moderation — every word is innocuous and there are no links!

  124. MadamaB,

    I love turkey tetrazini. Have you ever read Calvin Trillin? He used to write about food for the New Yorker. He always said that the best Thanksgiving dinner was spaghetti carbonara. I could go for that.

  125. madamab

    i agree-the economy would be a priority but with McCain we’d know a lot more about wtf they were doing.
    Obama holds news conferences and makes pronouncements
    who knows what in the hell is going on.
    It’s going to be a secretive administration and I hate that.

    ok will stop being debbie downer now!

    party!

  126. SOD: I don’t know. I wrote a post about parsnips at reclusive leftist yesterday and it went to moderation. I can’t think of any trigger words that remotely involve parsnips.

  127. Catarina: don’t go! you have to get me through the next 35 mins!! did you see the debbie downer when they were at disney world? That was so funny!!!

  128. parsnip could be a code word for a you know..

  129. LOL! Parsnips are so lewd!

  130. Catarina,

    Don’t get us started on the tiny pee pee stuff again!

  131. Micki where are you
    are you stuck somewhere?

    i can take my laptop and my johnny mac cutout to the kitchen if you need me to stick around

  132. SOD,

    I released all your comments. I think some were duplicates.

  133. Catarina, I challenge you to write a sentence that involves substituting the word “parsnip” for you know. It cannot be done!

  134. yes, boomer lewd :-) lmao

  135. micki just thought of several
    cant post them here
    lmao
    *hyperventilating*

  136. I am stuck at work. I have to be here until 7. Its dreadful. I had to leave early yesterday for a meeting and I have to finish things up here, so I said I’d stay until 7 this evening. I get Friday off, anyway.

    I’m going up to read SOD’s story. BRB.

  137. Hey folks! The holiday shopping season is fast upon us! Go to the

    NEW THREAD

    for a great gift idea!

  138. SOD: I think it was “silly birds.” Let me see if this posts and we’ll know.

  139. That’s a great story, SOD.

  140. No that shoots my theory to shit.

  141. Well, I have no idea, but I liked the story. :)

  142. I just hope someone will be checking in here tomorrow when I’m all alone, slaving away on my dissertation. If not, I’ll sign up a bunch of sock puppets and talk to myself.

  143. boomer!

    I’ll check on you and say hi to your puppets tomorrow.
    Will they be friendly sorts of puppets?

  144. sod
    “str0lled” contains the offending word

  145. Nijma: aahhhhh. Well spotted. :)

  146. bb: will you have sock moneys? B/c I can’t come unless there are sock monkeys.

  147. antipasti: marinated eggplant, roasted peppers, fresh mozzarella, olives, capers, shaved fennel, herbed bread sticks

    rosemary parmesan roasted fingerling potatoes

    stuffed roasted turkey breast

    fresh greens, lemon vinaigrette

    meyer lemon cake with baked pears and vanilla gelato.

  148. speaking of monkeys

    micki did you see the “Trunk Monkey Compilation” on youtube?

  149. OK, but what the heck is a sock monkey?

  150. Catarina, that sounds great!

    Did you make you cod dish tonight b/c you had fennel on hand? I need a good cod recipe.

  151. Catarina: No, I will look it up when I get home. I’m getting ready to close up shop here (at LAST!).

    BB: Sock monkeys are awesome. They are basically like sock puppets, but they are made with tweedy looking material. The sock money has a white head where the toe is. Then, there are button eyes and a red mouth.

  152. Go here: sock monkeyy

  153. Wait, that did not work:

    try again

  154. yeah what the heck is a sock monkey

    i made the cod b/c my husband, who just walked in, is a spoiled man.
    but hey, he makes me coffee and breakfast every day so I don’t mind being the dinner wench

  155. see you later, all
    micki will share cod recipe next time..

  156. My husband assembles IKEA. yay! (sigh)

  157. HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE!!! I am outta here!

  158. Fun Thanksgiving memory – many moons ago I worked in the advertising dept. at Macy’s Herald Square. Naturally, I jumped at the chance to be in the parade, and my first year I got to be a clown.

    As I waited uptown for the parade to start and my group of clowns (pushing giant wooden TV cameras… yeah, we were the original media circus), I noticed a little girl on her dad’s shoulders freaking out at all the clowns milling about. The parents were getting frustrated, fearing they would have to leave and disappoint their older child. I went over to the family, not too close, and held out one of the balloons (mylar, not the big-ass Snoopy kind) I was holding, and the little girl calmed down and cautiously reached out for it. I gave the other one to the older sibling. The little girl was dazzled by the shiny balloon and started smiling. The parents were so thankful. In true clown fashion, I didn’t say a word, just smiled and waved.

    Now, let me tell you, what you don’t realize when you watch the parade on TV is that is is one LONG freaking walk from the starting point down to Herald Square, and those marching bands only play one song. Over and over and over. And it’s not one non-stop march. Every time there’s a performance in front of the store, the rest of the parade has to stop and wait for it to finish before moving on again, so depending on what your character is, you’ve got something different to do so you’re not just standing around during the pauses. We had a choreographed clown dance to entertain the parade-goers, and it was a lot of fun, but believe me, by the time we hit 34th Street, I was wiped out.

    When we reached the end of the line we had to go in a special entrance to the store and go up to the special events floor to turn in our costumes. I was a little sad to turn in my gold lame clown suit and my semi-bald, orange-haired wig, but it was time to go shower and head out to my in-laws on Long Island.

    I headed for the subway to go back uptown to my brother-in-law’s apartment to shower and change, since it was closer and easier than going home. I sat down on the train and waited for it to go. I started to notice people staring at me, some of them (clearly tourists) even smiling at me. Now, this is NYC… people just don’t randomly smile at other people on the subway. But once the train started moving and we entered the tunnel I caught sight of myself in the window and realized why: I had forgotten to take off my clown make-up. :o)

  159. From below, :
    I think the best bailout should be give every citizen a large sum of money, 10,000 – maybe 50000, rather than the banks and companies. The banks and companies are still going to fire/layoff workers. Giving a large sum to citizens we can bailout he economy ourselves.

    It is common sense, not Fancy Ivy Leage Econ degree needed.

  160. My New Parrot

    Recently I received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird’s mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. I tried and tried to change the bird’s attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else I could think of to “clean up” the bird’s vocabulary. Finally, I was fed up and I yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. So, in desperation, I threw up my hands, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed.
    Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute. Fearing that I’d hurt the parrot, I quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto my outstretched arms and said “I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I’m sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior.” I was stunned at the change in the bird’s attitude. As I was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird continued, “May I ask what the turkey did?”

    HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

  161. I met a wild turkey in myiq’s liquor cabinet.

    Thanksgiving stories. Well, one year I was at my in-laws’ in Boston. My husband’s grandmother had been acting a bit unwell early in the evening. We were all worried about her. During dinner she grew very faint and started slurring her words. My father-in-law and brother-in-law took her to the hospital.

    My mother-in-law, sick with worry over her mother, absent-mindedly turned on the oven’s self-cleaning feature without removing the pan from the oven. Soon smoke began billowing out of the oven and set off the smoke detector. We called the fire department and presently saw an entire ladder company barge up Atlantic Avenue, sirens blaring, pull into the building’s parking lot and raise the ladder to the third-floor apartment while all the neighbors stood on their balconies wondering what the hell was going on. My sister-in-law leapt to her feet and said, “Oh! Maybe some of the firemen are single! I better put on some makeup.” The firemen came up the stairs and bravely put their lives on the line to put out the pan fire in the oven.

    It turned out grandmother-in-law had had a mild stroke. She was soon her old self.

  162. madamab: these your folks? http://www.toylounge.com/shagbeatstic.html

  163. A True Tale: “The Saga of Tom Turkey” by kenosha Marge

    http://insightanalytical.wordpress.com/2008/11/26/a-true-tale-the-saga-of-tom-turkey-by-kenosha-marge/

    Have a great holiday everybody, from all of us at IA! Marge’s story is fabulous!!!!

  164. I feel so fortunate. Everything y’all are baking sounds scrumptious. We’re going to a friend’s house and I’m in charge of rolls LOL. I don’t think they have much faith in my ability to cook.

  165. I hope no one purchased a Butterball turkey, they’re recalling them.

    …they forgot to butter their balls!
    :)

    OK, now this one.

    A young man named John received a parrot as an early Christmas gift. The
    parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of
    the bird’s mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried
    and tried to change the bird’s attitude by consistently saying only polite
    words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to ‘clean up’
    the bird’s language.

    Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled
    back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. John,
    in desperation, threw up his hands, grabbed the bird and shoved him in the
    freezer.

    For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly
    there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute. Fearing that
    he’d hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer.

    The parrot calmly stepped out onto John’s outstretched arms and said ‘I
    believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I’m
    sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend
    to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior’.

    John was stunned at the change in the bird’s attitude. As he was about to
    ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the
    bird continued, ‘May I enquire as to what the turkey in the freezer did to
    offend you?’

    Happy Thanksgiving!

  166. This was a fun thread reading all your posts. Though I am a vegetarian, all your menu items made my mouth water. I will be cooking some Indian special food as well tomorrow, but turkey will be spared.

  167. Awwww, poor New York turkey. Thing is, these are flock animals – I’m sure it is sorta lost, being all alone without its peeps.

    I live in Nashville and the feathered critters are all over the place, including a local golf course. Contrary to rumor, they can fly. Like the wind, if they’re threatened.

    We’re having ham, which depresses me if I think about it. Hmmmm.

  168. I kid you not, I see wild turkeys outside my damn HOUSE every. single. day. Welcome to Oregon! They’re actually pretty nasty and the babies are afraid of them.

  169. Micki, on November 26th, 2008 at 5:26 pm Said: kenoshamarge, I like the “tedious boyfriend” image.

    Tedious doesn’t begin to describe this twit. He endlessly repeats talking points and thinks he’s the smartest one in the room. She gazes adoringly up at him until I want to smack her upside her silly head.

    However, we all cut her some slack because this is this first guy she’s bagged and we fully expect her to show up this afternnoon with Tedious tied to her front bumper.

  170. Want to add to the T-Day chuckles? Visit me at
    http://www.sandysays1.wordpress.com The Thanksgiving posts are “As time and Thanksgiving go by” & Thanksgiving from a turkey’s point of view” They are down under my latest post titled, “Caught in the pot” Enjoy.

  171. Cute dog, Sandy!

Comments are closed.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 459 other followers

%d bloggers like this: